Asher nodded tightly. “Yeah, flower. Not that I think she’d admit to me that she wasn’t okay. Seems like that girl could be bleeding from a bullet wound and cover it with a Band-Aid and declare there was nothing wrong,” he said seriously.
“Well, at least I know what a bullet wound looks like should that ever happen,” I replied, looking at my feet. The events of yesterday invaded my mind. Worry that seemed to pile on top of everything else weighing me down.
Asher seemed to sense my growing panic. His hand tightened. “I’m gonna take care of this, flower. I’m gonna take care of you,” he promised.
I didn’t want to, but I sank into his hold, into the warm cocoon his words provided. I should have argued. I should have told him that I would take care of myself, that I had to. Otherwise, I’d get lost in him. But I didn’t.
He kissed my lips gently. “See you tonight?” he asked when I reluctantly pulled back.
“I’m working tonight,” I groaned. “And the next, and the next, maybe until the end of time. Or until Bex heals and I don’t have to cover both of our rents.” I frowned at the prospect of surviving all of this even more tired than I usually was. At how I was going to keep my GPA high enough to keep my scholarship. Pressure hit my chest, and I felt a vice around my lungs.
Asher’s jaw tightened. “I said I’d take care of you, Lily. That means you don’t have to work at that place anymore,” he told me flatly.
My panic was momentarily forgotten. It would never be truly forgotten, the pressure on my chest told me that. But anger seemed to be a good distraction.
“I’m late,” I snapped. “That means I cannot articulate everything wrong with that sentence. I’ll condense my rant. You won’t pay my rent. You won’t turn me into a helpless woman reliant on you for everything from orgasms to electricity bills,” I informed him in a tight voice.
His face turned hard at my words, and I didn’t give him a chance to respond.
“I’ve got to go,” I said tightly, hoisting my bag onto my shoulder, and turning my back on him.
Asher’s hand fastened around my wrist, and he yanked me back into his body, plastering my lips with his before I could protest. It was embarrassing that even though I was annoyed, I didn’t fight one bit.
“You don’t get it, flower. I’m the one who’s reliant on you,” he murmured against my mouth. “Just trying to find a way to even the scales.”
My anger dissipated in an instant. My fragile emotional state had my state of mind in a precarious position.
“You’re late,” he reminded me gently.
“I’m late,” I agreed.
He rested his forehead on mine for a moment longer before I sighed and used all my willpower to walk out the door.
“Lily?”
It took me a moment to register my name being called. I jerked my head up from its position bent over a medical textbook.
“Aids?” I blinked at the sheepish figure standing beside the table I’d claimed in the corner of the library. All of my books were scattered atop of it. I think most of my wits were hiding amongst the pages.
“Mind if I sit?” He gestured to the seat across from me.
I shook my head, moving books around.
He sat, regarding me anxiously. “I’m surprised you’re talking to me. That you didn’t just tell me to screw off,” he said slowly.
I tilted my head. “Of course I’m talking to you, why would I tell you to screw off?” I asked, perplexed.
He frowned, then the sheepish look returned. “That night, outside your work? I met your boyfriend’s fist? Said some pretty ugly things to you. Some things I want to apologize profusely for,” he said.
I nodded. “Oh that, sorry, my head’s not exactly doing its best with the whole thinking thing,” I joked lightly. “I’m the one that’s sorry. Asher was out of line.” I inspected his nose, thankfully it was still straight and perfect. I hadn’t seen him since that night, hadn’t heard from him. I was a bad person, I didn’t even try and contact him. I should have. He’d been a good friend to me. But with everything else going on, I’d just never found the time. I was surprised I was only just running into him now, after being back for almost a month. Then again, I was almost always hurrying to my next class or camped out in the library.
Aiden shook his head. “No, he did the right thing. I was out of line…” he paused, “I was just surprised. You looked so different, you were acting so different and him,” he looked at me in the eye for the first time, “he’s not someone I ever expected you’d be with,” he said carefully. His eyes ran over me. “You look more like yourself,” he pointed out.