I couldn’t help but giggle, but I was also getting even more flustered by the minute. “Russian plague, remember?”
“I’d be willing to catch that disease.” His smile quickly faded and he went back to being his serious self in a split second. “I mean, I’m sure many men wouldn’t mind catching the plague.”
I wished the floor would swallow me up. I couldn’t believe that somehow Anthony had now learned I was a damn virgin. I had never been so embarrassed. Anthony and I couldn’t be more different. He was older, experienced, rich, and powerful. I was young, poor, a virgin, and pathetic.
Our appetizers were set in front of us, but I had suddenly lost my appetite, despite how gorgeous the plate of fruit and ham looked.
And Anthony looked like I’d just slapped him across the face. His lips were pinched tight, brows drawn together, looking like a storm cloud. “I’m sorry. None of that was my business, and I can see I embarrassed you. I just wanted to know if there is anyone I should be keeping my eye on. If there was some man in your life or someone you are interested in.” He sat back in his chair, staring down at his clam chowder as if it were a bowl full of frogs. “I know your father was in the Bratva, and kept you protected and shielded from as much bad as he could. I also promised your father that I would protect you with my life. The life of crime would not come knocking on your door no matter what. Your father made sure of that before his death, and I am guaranteeing it myself. You’re safe. You’re also safe from me. So, it’s my job to make sure anyone in your life now or who comes into it passes my test, just as your father would have done.”
I cleared my throat, unable to believe we were having a conversation like this at dinner. We did not discuss my father in this way, or what he did ever. The word Bratva was rarely said. Even with my father, it was a topic rarely brought up. “I know I’m safe. And I know that my father had high expectations of you in regards to me. But you don’t have to live by them.”
“Yes, I do. I gave my word. My word is everything. I may be a fucking dick in many ways, but I do have a code that I live by. Your father knew this, and I will not dishonor his memory by going against what I promised. I hope he died knowing I would forever watch over you.”
“I’m sure he did,” I said softly. “I just wish he were here to do it himself.”
“I do too.” He took a deep breath and then sipped from his wine. “Regardless, I’m sorry. I was too nosey and had no business asking that question of you.”
I shrugged, wanting desperately to end the conversation. “I’m just not used to having someone care about me like you do. I feel like you watch my every move.”
“I do. I care about you very much, and yes, I will always watch over you whether you like it or not. You and Dasha were my family, and even if he hadn’t been murdered, my feelings for you would make me overprotective anyway,” he said, his expression darkening. “I don’t want that to scare you though.”
“Your feelings for me?” I asked without even thinking.
“Yes.” He paused and studied me in silence long enough that I had no choice but to fidget in my chair. “How much do you know about the mafia? About what your father was involved with? About me and my connections with it?” His skeptical look made it very clear that I couldn’t pull one over on him and fake that I knew all about it.
“Nothing. My father forbade me to be involved in any way. That also meant that I couldn’t ask questions. I eavesdropped enough growing up that I got the idea… but I know very little. As for you, I knew you worked with him and the Russian mob because I overheard my father and you speaking about it on occasion at our dinners.” I took a long swallow of my water to try to wash away the large lump forming in the back of my throat. “But don’t feel you have to defend your life and job. I’m not judging at all.”
“Which is why both your father and I felt you were safe. I still will make sure of it, but your father shielded you from knowing too much and his colleagues and even his enemies are aware that when it comes to knowledge, you are useless in that regard. He wanted to make sure that you would be forgotten before he died. I believe you have been and no one would ever use you for retribution for anything. Especially now that your father has passed.” He cleared his throat and looked uncomfortable. “But if my enemies got wind that you were close to me, then… but I would never allow that to happen.”