“Running isn’t how I handle things,” he said.
She wanted to challenge him and point out that his deciding to work this morning rather than being there with his brother had sure seemed like running. Or at the very least, avoidance. But she didn’t say it.
“Okay, maybe I’m reading you wrong,” she said, “but it seems to me that every time someone mentions the hospital, you look a little freaked out. It seems like you and your brother have a pretty good relationship. I’m trying to figure out why you don’t...”
Her words trailed off as his eyes searched her face. He looked a little panicked. She decided maybe she shouldn’t push it. Instead, she let the silence stretch between them for a moment.
“Just because I don’t spend every waking hour at his bedside doesn’t mean I don’t care.”
He sounded defensive. She really hadn’t meant to upset him.
“I’m not judging, Daniel. So, please don’t be angry.”
“I’m not angry.”
“If you’re not then will you hear me out?”
He nodded.
“Even though he’s in a coma, he might be able to hear your voice, or sense your presence. Knowing you’re there might make him stronger.”
He bent forward, placing his elbows on his knees, looking down, very much the same way he’d sat at the hospital. She prepared herself for him to get up and leave. So, she stayed as quiet and still as she could while he sat next to her.
“I don’t mean to not do right by Aidan,” he finally said. “It’s because hospitals aren’t my favorite place. Every time there’s been an emergency that involved a hospital, the odds have never turned out in my favor. The person I love has never come out alive. My folks were in a car wreck when I was going into my senior year of high school. They never made it out alive. My grandmother had a stroke and they couldn’t fix her. My wife had an aneurysm, but they couldn’t save her. Now Aidan is in there fighting for his life. He and Chloe are all the family I have left.”
He shrugged.
Wife? Daniel had been married? It was the first she’d heard of it, but it didn’t feel like the right time to ask him about it.
“I’m sorry.” She thought about reaching out and taking his hand. “I didn’t know that’s what it was about.”
“Did you think I didn’t feel like going?”
“No, Daniel. There was no judgment. I really didn’t know what it was about, but I could sense something.” She held up her hands. “No judgment, I promise. However, think about this. You not going to the hospital doesn’t change the fact that Aidan’s there. It’s such good news that he’s stabilizing, but you still need to talk to him. You need to go see him. If not for yourself, for Chloe. And, of course, if you need help with Chloe or someone to go with you to the hospital to help you through it—my family and I are here for you. I’m here for you.”
“Thanks, Elle. You’re lucky to have them—your family.” He curved his lips into a smile, but the sentiment didn’t reach his eyes.
She nodded.
“Your grandmother has always been good to me. She took in my family after the fire and now she’s making Chloe feel so safe and happy. All the years in between, she’s been decent and kind to me. She could see beyond the hooligan I might have been when I was a teenager to the person I’ve become. And it was because of her kindness that people in this community stopped trying to shut me out.”
“Gigi has always been a kind person,” Elle said, but it felt so inadequate.
And Daniel had been married.
“You’re a kind person, too, Elle.” he said. “I haven’t abandoned my brother. But the truth is, going in and holding constant vigil at his bedside while he’s hooked up to tubes and machines is hard.”
“I’ll go with you.”
He nodded. “That might help. How about today when I take a lunch break?”
“You’ve got it.”
“Now you need to tell me about the complication that’s keeping you from loving your job.”
“I did make that deal, didn’t I?”