“You said that already.”
“She told me that you were in the city to visit your family.”
I grunt. “I was manipulating her, Kitty. Yes, I know. I fucking suck. I get it. I fucking get it. And that’s why I let her go, dammit. Because Idosuck. By lying so early on, I broke something fundamental—”
“Shut up. That’s defeatist and my brother is not easily defeated. Look, I’m not going to say you don’t have some serious issues. You know, what with lying to her from the start and—”
“Covering up the murder of her father?” I drawl, rolling the pillow and tucking it under my neck.
Kitty hums. “Exactly. But you did cover up her tracks, and she kinda owes the Five Points some thanks for that.”
“She owes us nothing.”
“Her father got the Irish Mob involved in bringing her back to the city,” she drawls. “You seriously think you didn’t end up being a better option? Can you imagine if he’d worked on the leader of the Albanians’ knee instead of Aidan’s?” When I blanch at the notion, she nods. “Exactly.”
“I shouldn’t have seduced her.”
“Look at my brother, thinking he’s Casanova.”
I glower at her smirk. “Shut up, Kitty. Leave me the hell alone.” When she doesn’t disappear and, instead, plunks herself down beside me, I mutter, “Maybe this is for the best.”
“I don’t think it is.”
“She said she needed to find herself.” I scrub a hand over my face. “I didn’t even realize she was lost. I’m not an idiot, I knew she was bad, but I figured we’d work on that together.”
“I hate to state the obvious, Cade, but she’s a recovering addict who just shot her father. If that wasn’t insane enough, that man murdered her mom and abused Belle as a kid. Can you blame her for feeling lost?”
I couldn’t.“I don’t, but she never talked about it.”
“What did you do when you came up here after work?” She sighs. “And please don’t tell me you were only fucking like rabbits.”
“Of course we were.”
“No wonder she left you. She thinks you’re only interested in sex.” When I don’t contradict her, she frowns. “That’s not all there is between you, right?”
I scrub a hand over my stubbled jaw. “No.”
“Well, why did you make her feel like it was?”
“You want to know the truth?”
“No, I’d prefer you lie to me,” she mocks.
“You’re a pain in the ass.”
“I know. Spill.”
“I knew she’d leave eventually. It made sense from how we came together. She’s the best sex I’ve ever had. I figured…”
When my words wane, she shakes her head. “You figured that you were the best sex she’d ever had, too, so you’d keep her busy until she forgot to leave?”
“Pretty much.”
“That worked out well for you, didn’t it?”
“What else was I supposed to do?”
“Talk to her? Tell her you didn’t want her to go?” She sighs again, and somehow, those sighs make me feel like more of a moron than her whooping me with my pillow. “It’s your life, Cade. I’d have left you alone if you hadn’t spent the last week getting drunk. Lucas messaged Mom to ask what was going on with you because you called in sick for the second time in a row.”