“Eyes on me, Star,” I whispered softly, happy when they popped open and clashed with mine.
Dazed, I watched the dilation of her pupils as they bloated, contracting fully as her brow puckered, soft cries escaping her as she neared—
Like it had never been there in the first place, she sagged.
For a moment, we both froze.
I thought she’d start again, but she didn’t. If anything, she seemed to shrink in front of me. Shame curdled into mortification.
Surprised, I rasped, “Take it slow. There’s no rush.”
She wriggled her leg from between mine, jerked at my wrist to move it away, then flopped onto her back. She didn’t jump out of bed though, just lay there, panting as she stared up at the ceiling.
Unsure of what had happened, I moved nearer. “What went wrong?”
“I-I don’t know.”
I knew she’d been into it. “Did your mind drift?”
She swallowed. “Maybe.”
Definitely.
“What can we do to stop that from happening again?”
Her head rocked to the side. “How about I kill every man that touched me?”
“That’s a solution, I guess.”
With a huff, she muttered, “A shitty solution.” Reaching up, she rubbed her eyes. “It’s like conceding defeat.”
“What is?”
“They used to force me to fight, Conor. My getting off wasn’t fun for them, but—” She sighed. “The guy who bought me, the one I killed, he used to like doing stuff to get me off. Then he’d say it wasn’t rape. He’d tell me that he loved me and he’d make me tell him…” Her brow furrowed. “I lost myself. I lost everything.”
“That piece of shit,” I growled.
“Why do you think I snapped his neck?” she muttered, her arm moving to cover her face so she could hide her eyes from me. “It wasn’t just for the family silver.”
“What happened?”
“He got me pregnant.”
My mouth rounded in astonishment. “Y-You had a baby with him?”
“No.” Her throat bobbed. “When I found out, he was happy.” Her top lip curved into a sneer. “I’d already intended on killing him, but like I said, I got… lost. That sped things along fast.”
Lost—I couldn’t imagine Star ever being that way. She was such a force to be reckoned with. I couldn’t imagine wanting her to be anything other than what she was—living, breathing mayhem.
“What things?”
“He wasn’t my husband at the time.”
“The pregnancy made it happen?”
“Yes. It worked in my favor. He said he loved me, and I knew what would happen if I got pregnant—”
“Did you make it happen on purpose?” I questioned softly.