I swallowed my bite of pizza and shrugged. Sure, it was cool that he was looking at me this late in the college admissions game, but it didn’t matter. College was a no-go for me. Didn’t want to go. I needed to finish healing, do my PT, and head off to basic training. That was all that mattered.
“Grace is enlisted in the Air Force,” Clarissa said. “She doesn’t care about Coach Johns.”
My spine stiffened. I didn’t like hearing someone else telling other people my business. It didn’t help matters that she’d snagged a seat next to Preach, while I’d slid in a chair at the other end of the table next to Sam.
I reached for a glass of ice water and took a long swig.He just told me that he likes me. He can’t help that she sat next to him, and I’m certainly not going to scream, “Take your hands off my man,” at her.
I wasn’t sure he was my man. That was a big step. I liked him. He liked me. We were going out on a date after this team meal. That was enough right now, because if I thought about it too much, I might run out of here, all the way home, and put a pillow over my head. It was just too scary.
“My stepdad is in the Air Force,” Becca said. “He’s on his fourth tour.”
“Wow,” I said. “Very admirable.” I tried not to let my mind wander, but evidently it wasn’t following my instructions today. Emmett’s face immediately popped up. Including his last words.“I’m disappointed in you.”
It felt like someone conked me over the head with a baton. The words echoed in my mind, in his voice. His familiar voice. And it stole my breath. At the end of the race, I’d felt him so close to me. Smelled his soap, almost felt his big arms around me, in a crushing, congratulatory hug.
And it was happening again. Right here. Right now.
Do not start crying,I willed myself.Donotstart crying.
But like my mind wasn’t following my orders to not think of Emmett, my eyes burned with tears. I had to get out of here. I couldn’t let them see me cry like this.
I shoved back my chair and stood.
“I need to go to the restroom,” I said to Sam, who had given me a questioning look. “Be right back.”
I practically ran away from the table, but instead of going to the bathroom, I pushed through the glass doors and headed outside.
The parking lot was nearly full. A family of five were getting out of a minivan. Wiping my eyes, I headed around the side of the building. I needed some fresh air. That’d help.
Taste of Rome was nestled beside another building, a laundromat or something, but it gave me privacy. The building shaded the sun, and a cold burst of air whipped around me.
Halfway down the alley, I leaned against the brick wall. “Shit.” I slid down, and my butt hit the ground. “Emmett, I miss you so much.”
I grabbed my phone and opened my photos. With two taps, I brought his face to the front. We looked so much alike, when people saw our baby pictures side-by-side, they thought we were fraternal twins. And even though he was four years older and way bigger than me, we still favored each other a lot. Matching auburn hair, blue eyes, and identical smiles. We’d been inseparable growing up despite our age difference. It helped that Alec was right in the middle. The three of us were always getting into trouble together.
Then, one night, in an instant, everything changed. I’d never seen my brother so furious. After he and Alec fought, we’d gotten into it and things had ended badly.
I’m disappointed in you, Grace!His final words to me rattled like a tower bell in my mind, and I couldn’t help but flinch.
Alec and I had been into each other for a while but pushed it off. On my sixteenth birthday, though, we’d given in to the feelings and had sex. Before we could even process what’d happened, Emmett barged in.
The memory punched me in the gut like his words.
I’m disappointed in you, Grace!
“Everything okay?” Preach’s hand lightly touched my shoulder.
I sniffled and wiped my eyes. “Oh, um. Yeah, I’m okay.”
He crouched down, and we were eye-to-eye. There wasn’t a hint of annoyance or judgment in his chocolate eyes. Only concern. It was refreshing to have someone look at me like that. Someone who actually wanted to hear what I had to say about my brother. The little bits I’d told him so far had gone well.
I could trust him with this, right? With Emmett’s memory?
Deep down, I knew I could.
“I just…I was just thinking about Emmett.” I showed him my phone. “This is the last picture we took together.”
“You look really happy.” Preach sat beside me, resting his back against the brick wall.