Mary knew he was asking to see where she was at mentally, to see if she was scared or intimidated, and it meant so much to know he was checking on her.
“I feel… whole, Jax,” she admitted softly, not looking away from him. “This is more than I ever imagined, and something I needed but was too afraid to wish for.”
She knew her words were there, before him, and held such a double meaning… but she couldn’t say more than that. This beach, this escape, these moments, and Jax being here beside her – she truly felt whole in this moment, and like a real person.
“I’m glad,” he smiled – and gave her hand a little tug. “Let’s get you in the water.”
He pulled her forward towards the surf, and she couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up within her, seeing his playfulness emerging. He could have kissed her, made that moment so much more intense between them, but instead, he was urging her towards something that would spark joy in her soul…
The warm water washed up against her and she was so surprised at the pulling sensation of the surf as it swept back towards the ocean. Tiny little bubbles appeared in the sand by her toes as it began to wash away at the disturbance of their feet there in water. The heady smell of salt water was almost thick in the air to where she could taste it.
She took in everything, learning and absorbing, using every sense within her.
She always imagined the ocean would be a deep, bright, vibrant blue, and had seen photos of it… but here it was almost a murky blue, and clear as it rolled over her feet.
Jax was pulling her forward a little deeper, and she felt a bubble of fear because she could no longer see her toes as she stood in the thigh-high waters.
“I’ve got you,” he promised, smiling at her. “We won’t go any deeper than this, and I don’t want you to worry.”
“Can you tell?” she laughed nervously.
“Just slightly,” he grinned, teasing.
He dunked down slightly, and she followed suit, feeling slightly odd as she felt herself buoyant, bobbing with each wave, and unsettled as the beach eroded out from beneath her feet with each roll of the water.
Staring, she saw that the waves were cresting off in the distance… and couldn’t help but stare as she saw things ‘riding’ the waves – with dorsal fins!
“Are those sharks?!” she gasped, backing up immediately, and saw him jerk up out of the water bodily, looking protective, as he surveyed the area around them… and then turned to her.
“Dolphins,” he acknowledged. “You have a good eye.”
“Oh,” she smiled, blushing nervously, as she realized her mistake. “I guess I’m a little antsy at all of this.”
“It’s different and new – but don’t be afraid to speak up or ask,” he urged supportively. “I want you to enjoy every bit of this escape, but if you are scared, then it’s not fun.”
“I want you to enjoy this too.”
“I am,” he said openly. “Just by being with you and seeing your smile.”
Mary looked at him, saw his warm gaze so full of adoration as he gazed at her… and couldn’t resist. She stepped closer to him, into his arms, and kissed him, needing to show him how this all made her feel.
She cared – and no matter how scared she was at opening up? He’d somehow reached her, encouraging her out of her shell, and she felt free enough to share such an embrace of affection.
Jax’s arms swept around her, as he kissed her deeply, clinging to his shoulders as her knees went weak and the sand washed out beneath her. He was everything to her, and she couldn’t imagine a world without his smile now that she was getting to know him.
They stood there, holding each other, kissing for what felt like forever, and she felt herself responding as something changed between them… moving from a simmer – to a boil.
She hadn’t felt passion flare within her in years, but somehow wasn’t frightened – this was her Jax. He was there, holding her, steadying her, encouraging her… and then he suddenly wasn’t.
Jax pulled away, looking at her with so much yearning and desire as they stood there drawing in breath…
“Wait right there,” he said hoarsely – and literally dove into the water before standing up, his back towards her, raking the water back from his hair and face, looking over his shoulder.
“Are y-you… is everything…” she stammered nervously.
“I, ah, um… whoa man, this is embarrassing,” he uttered, and looked away.
“What’s wrong?” she said, feeling very self-conscious at that moment. They had been kissing and holding each other, sharing a beautiful moment, and now he was just… he was cutting her off, pushing her away? “Is it me? Am I being too clingy or forward? I’m sorry if I…”