“That sounds great.”
Firefly nodded and moved to go get in the car, hesitated, and looked at them both. “No matter what anyone says… Don’t drink the beer Alpo brings. It’s like watered down swill. Stick with either Valkyrie’s or mine. Thumper doesn’t even touch the stuff anymore since he became a Daddy.”
“Oh wow,” Jax beamed. “I completely forgot that Hot Cakes mentioned that there would be little ones there. He was telling me about how Armadillo, Valkyrie, Thumper, and Alpo, all have children now.”
“Me too,” Firefly volunteered proudly. “My daughter Betsy is my shy little princess – unless she’s playing with ‘Dilla’s boy, Luke. I think the two egg each other on just to see who can make the most noise.”
“You’re a dad? Now that’s a scary thought,” Houdini teased.
“Right?” Firefly grinned, laughing. “But my Betsy has me wrapped around her finger… just like her Mama. I would do anything for either of them, so yeah. I’m a Daddy now – and I love it.”
Jax didn’t say anything.
He sat silently in the back of the car, looking out the window and lost in his own thoughts. It was strange how life changed people, and Firefly seemed happier than he’d ever been, like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
Was it so wrong to want that for himself? A person of his own to care for, to be there to talk to, a friend for life, a love for all time?
No one could ever know how much it hurt to be rejected time and time again. He’d heard all the excuses too. It wasn’t that he was ugly or had something grotesque to drive away girls – in fact, it was the opposite.
Girls flocked to him at bars when he went out with the guys, but the second he tried to be a gentleman? Buy them a drink? Pull out a chair for them? Talk politely to them? Tried to hold a friendly conversation?
They were done.
Every single one of them.
He could pinpoint the exact moment that he lost his chance – and could see it in their faces, their eyes, and heard it in their voices.
“I’m sorry, but this just isn’t it for me…”
“You’re nice, but…”
“I thought you’d be different…”
“Maybe my mom would like you…”
Ouch.
Were guys not polite anymore? Did they not value relationships, cherish women, or treat them with respect?
One girl had scarred him for life, and he would never forget that… that was the last blind date he’d been on - and now knew how to make an exit quickly.
She’d cornered him near the men’s restroom, shoved him against a wall, and when he looked shocked? She’d gotten angry that he hadn’t grabbed at her yet, slapped him across the face, and told him to kiss her, ordering him to spit in her mouth, or else ‘this date was over before it really got started’.
… Oh, it was over alright?!
JaxRAN.
He’d never been so shocked or stunned in his entire life!
He bolted out of the place so fast he thought for sure there was a dust trail behind him like in the cartoons. He called from the taxi to pay the bar tab because he’d run away from that incident that had left him shaken.
It had left him reeling that someone, a slip of a woman, could be so aggressive with him. He had always pictured kissing a girl or being with someone as a tender, gesture of love - not some violent, abrasive, disgusting…fling?!
He swallowed back nausea at the realization that he was putting himself out there again, one more time, to be rejected yet another time… and hesitated.
Maybe instead of trying so hard – perhaps Valkyrie was right? Maybe he should just be himself? So far no one had liked the real Jax, but if he took his time… got to know a person, then maybe things would be different?
… Or maybe not?