Ben was sitting on the floor in the living room playing with the new hot wheels track Papa bought him - another gift to spoil my child. “Okay, buddy, let’s get all your cars together. Kahlia is going to watch you at Nana and Pawpaw’s house this afternoon.”
He cheered before jumping up to put all his cars in the box I had for them, and I couldn’t help the happiness that spread through my chest. A light knock on the door told me Kahlia was here, so I walked over and let her in.
“Mornin’ Ms. Annagayle.” She came in with a big smile for me, like always. She was just so polite and reliable. It didn’t matter that her bright blonde locks were a drastic contrast from the clothing she wore. Or that her eye makeup was a little too dark for someone her age. She looked like a little skater girl with a long sleeved checkered shirt covering a black tube top that hung open, complemented with a pain of cut off jean shorts. Avril Lavigne would describe her perfectly in a song if she was a boy.
“Hey, Kahlia.” I chuckled. “I’ve told you before, you can just call me Anna. Ms. Annagayle just sounds entirely too formal.” She gave me a nod of understanding. “I’m going to take you two up to my parents house today, but I need you to promise me that you’ll watch him around the pool. I know there’s a gate surrounding it, but better safe than sorry.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll watch him like a hawk,” she promised, and I knew she would.
“Kahlia!” Benjamin exclaimed with all the enthusiasm of a kid who had Lucky Charms for breakfast and was on a sugar rush.
“Mornin’, little munchkin.” She smiled at Ben as he ran up to give her a hug, and she bent down to return it.
Hands on his hips with all the authority in the world, he looked up at her before he said, “I aint no munchkin.”
“All right you two, let’s get going.” I said as I reached up to grab the car keys from the mount on the wall by the door. Kahlia grabbed Ben’s backpack, and they ran out the front door like torpedoes on a target, headed toward my car. I hit the button on my keys to open the back latch on the car before locking up the house.
It didn’t take us long at all to reach the familiar large gated community of beach houses. Mama and Papa had purchased it when they retired. The house was surrounded by high walls of bushes that almost surpassed the brick portion of their home.
I typed in their code and waited as the gate slowly slid open, bidding us access. The kids were out of the car sprinting toward the front door as soon as it stopped, leaving me behind in the dust. Mama opened the front door right as they got to it, which told me she must have been peeking at them out the window. “Come in, come in,” she said as the kids ran past her inside. She waited on the porch for me to approach.
She huddled me into her embrace for a quick hug before shutting the door. “How you holding up today, sweetheart?” God, I wanted to cry from the nerves and memories attacking the very soul of me. It’d been six years. I’d done my makeup for the first time in years. Hell, I’d even tried on five outfits before deciding which one I wanted to wear for the day to look good.For him.
“Good, Mama. Just happy I got to see him before he passed on, even though it's sad he won’t be that smiling face anymore when I take my car into the shop for an oil change.” I diverted the conversation back to Luke.
“I know, baby.” She lifted her hand and ran it down my back in comfort like she used to do when I was small.
“You know the worst part? Ben didn’t even get a lot of time with him.”
A tear slid down my face as sadness washed over my features. She pulled me in for a hug. “It’ll be okay. At least he got to know him for a little while.” I nodded against her shoulder with a sniff.
The drive to the church was solemn, every one sad at the loss of one of our town staples. I was saddened at the loss of a great grandfather for Ben and upset for the little boy who’d grown into a man over the last six years and just lost his pops. I couldn’t even imagine how Julian was feeling about everything; coming home and taking over when you haven’t been here in years.
We pulled up to the church and my stomach churned over what was about to happen. Seems everyone else was feeling the same way. St. Michael’s Church was a white building with wood colored windows where we would say our goodbyes today. The inside was immersed in a sea of different shades of black.Who knew there could be so many?
Although his death wasn’t shocking, the whole town showed up like we’d all been one big family. He was the happy smile when you pulled into the car shop, and he was the guy who took the time to calm you when your car broke down and you needed a tow. He had a huge heart and wasn’t afraid to show it. He put everyone else first - staying late to fix a car, giving someone a ride home, helping with things that needed mending around town, or even giving someone a discount when they didn’t have the money to pay. Anything you needed, he was there.
Silverbell Shore had that small town vibe. You couldn’t go anywhere else and feel the same way as you did in this small town. It also had a wicked way of gossiping about just about anyone.
Luke was loved by all and had been a staple here since long before I was born. Cranky old Mr. Barber doesn’t like anyone, but still came out to show his respects for the man. My palms grew damp as we walked up the front steps to the church, and I had to focus so I wouldn’t fall. With each step, my heart beat grew more erratic. I could feel it everywhere. I didn’t think I would be able to avoid him here, and with the whole town watching, I had to be careful of what was said.
His father’s funeral was the worst time to tell Julian he had a son. I decided then and there it could wait until another day. I wouldn’t throw something else at him to digest. Taking a deep breath, I stepped through the doors behind my parents, and we found a seat in the back. The casket sat at the front of the church with a white pall draped over it, topped with a cross. A photo of Luke McCorrmick sat on the table to the left of the casket. It was a good photo to remember him by. It’d been taken a few years ago at the town fair before his health started to falter.
The mood of the crowd was somber.
Some people shed tears, while others simply sat back and listened to the priest. Monsignor Benedict read a passage from the gospel, followed by Julian, standing tall in a black suit, still the same beautiful man he was, reading a psalm and speaking about his beloved father. His eyes became glossy when he spoke of Luke, and I felt like tears were soon to follow. I didn’t blame him because I was skirting the edge, too.
As I looked at him, I couldn’t believe he was that same boy I used to love, but now he was grown up. His hair matched that of Ben’s. He still had that one stubborn stray curl that made him look like he had bangs sometimes. A 5 o'clock shadow was prominent, outlining his strong jawline. His shoulders were broader than they’d been back then, and I couldn’t help but wonder how they’d feel around me now.
I couldn’t see them this far away, but I remembered his chocolate colored eyes that I wanted to get drunk on over and over again. I remembered the chills that ran down my arms when he leaned in and whispered in my ear, his chilled breath drifting across my shoulders.
I’d gotten so lost in the memories that I hadn’t even realized it was the final part of the funeral.
Ending the service. Monsignor sprinkled the casket with holy water and incensed it before May the Choirs of Angels was played softly.
Most of the townsfolk wanted to stay to watch his casket be lowered into the ground. Those of us who stayed followed the casket to the graveside where a Rite of Committal was performed. Monsignor Benedict read a verse of scripture and said a special prayer over Luke’s body, followed by the congregation of people reciting the Lord’s Prayer, and then the priest delivered a final blessing.
As he spoke those final words, I couldn’t help but lift my gaze, and what I saw stunted my breath. Dark chocolate eyes locked on mine, and my heart caught in my chest. God, Julian was so handsome up close. How was it possible that he was even more attractive now than he was? Julian was the epitome of tall, dark, and handsome. My eyes skimmed his body. He was dressed in a white button down with a fitted black suit coat and pants that hung on his hips like they were meant to be worn by his body specifically.