And I keep pushing him away. Keep allowing the ghosts to take me.
Why am I living for ghosts when I have James?
I hear the door of his Range Rover slam shut and shortly after wheels spinning on the stones. I look back and see the rear end fishtailing, kicking up a thick smog of dust, and everyone is watching. And once James is out of sight, they all turn their attention to me sitting on the shore.
Rose comes and lowers beside me, motioning down the wetsuit she’s sporting. “Sexy, huh?”
I smile. “He let you out on the water?”
“No. I was watching Daniel close to the bay with Danny.”
While I collected their guns. A silence falls between us, and I focus on the soft slap of the water around my feet.
“Okay?” Rose asks.
“No,” I answer honestly.
“He’s right, you know, Beau.” She leans into me, attempting to lighten her hard truths. “You can’t do as you please to that extent. It’s not fair.” I can feel her eyes on me, and like the coward I am, I don’t look at her, keeping my welling eyes on the calm, crystal waters. They’re a stark contrast to the murky chaos of my mind.
“When Amber held a gun at you,” I say, hating myself for having to ask but needing to ask, nonetheless. It’s playing on my mind. “Did you think she’d pull the trigger?” I look at my friend and see despair. Despair for me, for James, for everyone who’s involved. “Truthfully.”
“Yes.” Rose places her hands in the sand and fists. “If Esther hadn’t showed up, I think she could have in that moment, yes.”
I nod and go back to gazing at the ocean.
“You honestly think she did it?” she asks.
“I think Cartwright knew something that would incriminate Amber. He spent a lot of time writing about my father.” I give her an ironic look that’s way out of place. “Dad was probably paying him.”
“He was a bit of a megalomaniac, wasn’t he?”
I laugh. That’s out of place too. “A bit.”
“So do you think Amber killed Cartwright too?”
“I don’t know. You know her better than I do. Do you think she’s capable of that?” I know what I’m doing and I’m doing it unashamedly. No, I don’t know Amber, but I know what Rose has told me. And I know my dad, a sensible, shrewd businessman, left her every penny. Whether he did that as one last kick while I was down or because he loved Amber, I don’t know. But I saw his face when Amber was exposed as a gold digger. He was mortified. Hurt. And I also know how he treated me. So actually, I’ll never have an answer for why he did it. But I may get closure on his death.
Rose’s expression says it all. Amber is perfectly capable. And why would she run from me when I saw her loitering in the parking lot? “It’s dog eat dog in this world,” Rose says quietly, looking off at the horizon. A pang of guilt stabs me. She’s thinking about when she had to survive in this world. When she didn’t have Danny. I’ve no doubt Rose would have killed if she needed to. “So what are you going to do?”
Good question. It seems I can’t keep James happyandtry to prove this. “I’m going to try and salvage what’s left of my relationship.” I push my way to my feet and offer my hands to Rose. “I know I can’t be a cop and be James’s. Your husband has reminded me of that.”
Rose takes my hands and lets me pull her up. “Very kind of him,” she says. “So which will you be? A cop or James’s?”
I link arms with her and walk us back to the cabin. “I need a beer,” I say, ignoring her question. I can’t promise to stand down, and I won’t. I have to get justice for at least one of my dead parents. I have to figure out how I do that without ruining James and me. “Where’s Fury?” I ask, scanning the place.
Rose sighs and then stops dead in her tracks on a slight hitch of breath. “Wait. Shit, you don’t know.”
“Know what?”
She faces me. “The Vikings. Their mom died.”
I step back, my sadness immediate. “No.”
She nods. “Danny let me take Daniel for pizza. Tank got the call while we were there. He called Fury, but they didn’t make it to her in time. Danny gave them some time off.”
I pull out my cell and dial Fury, needing to check if my bulletproof bodyguard is okay. He doesn’t answer. “You went for pizza?” I ask as we continue to the cabin.
“I know. We’re also looking at a school for Daniel.”