“Eh, it is what it is,” I brushed her off.
“So, I guess back to Louisiana it is?”
“Actually, I was thinking of doing some snooping around while we are still here.”
Her back straightened, and she smiled, “Does that mean you’re going to come shopping with Eli and me.” I absolutely hated shopping of any kind and despised buying things from the internet.
“No, thank you.” I shook my head.
“What kind of snooping are you going to be doing then?”
“Maybe see if I can get some info on Feather’s guitar without having to talk to Skip again.”
“Ooo, good idea. Let me get my shoes. We can postpone our shopping adventure. You know Eli will be heartbroken,” she sarcastically said, gathering our plates and tossing them into the trashcan.
“Huh?” Eli called from the bathroom as he opened the door.
“We’re not going shopping; I’m going to go with Fi.”
Eli lifted his fist into a ball and pulled his arm backward. “Cha-ching.”
“I kind of wanted to do this on my own. You know the whole embracing the baby bird leaving the nest thing?” I was honest with her.
“Oh, I get it.” She forced a smile and shot a hateful look at Eli.
“I mean, hey, we’re back on for night shopping, cha-ching.” Eli repeated the motion, but this time with less exuberance. Trinity shook her head and sighed.
“Trin, I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s fine. It is. I just worry about you, and we don’t know anyone here. You’re nineteen.”
“True, but I was pretty much taking care of myself when I was twelve. Mentally, I’m older than your average nineteen-year-old. I know how to survive. I’ll be okay. I promise.” I couldn’t exactly tell her I was trying to protect her. If I actually went through with what I planned, she didn’t need to be anywhere near me tonight.
“Fine,” she said after a loud huff. “But if you run into any trouble, you’ll call?”
“Of course, she will, Trinity.” Eli scooped her into a hug. I would thank him for that later when Trinity wasn’t around. I really did feel like shit for keeping this secret from her, but she would try and stop me if I told her. I wasn’t leaving Cupid’s Cove without holding Feather’s guitar one way or another. Honestly, the fact that Trinity believed I would give up so easily made me question if she genuinely knew the real me at all.
This was by far the stupidest and most desperate thing I had ever done. I didn’t know the man, but judging from our first encounter, I highly doubted Skip Turner was a man who accepted payment plans unless it was his idea. Not to mention, I had directly insulted his manhood. The rest of what happened between us didn’t make sense then, and it still didn’t make sense now. No clue what he thought of it because I didn’t stick around to discuss our feelings.
The walk from the bed and breakfast to Skip’s shop didn’t take long, although, my guilty conscious had me hallucinating. Every person I passed seemed to focus their attention on me. I wasn’t anyone, so I had to be making that up in myhead. Maybe there was something on my face. Just in case, I popped my phone out and looked at my reflection. I moved the camera around, capturing myself from different angles for good measure. Nothing looked out of place, so either these people were all nosy, or it might be my anxiety getting the better of me.
The door to the shop was propped open again. Did this guy ever close the door? I passed more people on my way here than I would on a two hour walk back home. Either he was very trusting of people or didn’t care if someone robbed him blind.
My fingers shook as I eased the door open the rest of the way and stepped inside. My eyes scanned the store for him, and I listened for his voice.
“Skip?” I quietly called into the dimly lit store. “Are you in here?” Only seconds passed, but it felt like hours were spent waiting for him to answer me. A bead of sweat trailed down my temple, and I quickly wiped it away. He didn’t strike me as the forgetful type, but in actuality, I didn’t know who the man was by any means. On the other hand, I typically was spot on when it came to my first impression of people. My gut feeling about someone usually turned out to be correct, and right now, it was telling me to turn around and run the other way. I couldn’t do it, though. I would never forgive myself I came this far only to leave emptyhanded.
Everything was in the same place or at least nothing seemed to stand out from how I remembered it from the last time I was here. The problem was, when I was here before, I hadn’t intended to have a reason to return, or I might have paid closer attention to the details. Seeing as I had essentially fallen over an amp that had no business being where it was as soon as my boots crossed the threshold, I didn’t get a lot of time to look around before my full attention was on pissing off Skip. He might not be here for me to work out some type of deal, but his absence wasn’ta complete loss. Without him here, I was given me more time to figure out what I was going to do.
To be honest, I considered breaking in here and straight up getting Feather’s guitar courtesy of the five-finger discount, but I wasn’t insanely keen on the idea of going to prison. The idea was still on the table, though, especially if I there was no chance of being caught. There was no crime in holding a guitar, though, so as soon as I found the damn thing, that was as far as my planning had gone. I figured I’d made it this far flying by the seat of my pants, so I would ride out the rest of this journey in the same fashion.
As soon as I saw the spotlight in the back of the store on a white and green guitar, I recognized the similarities. That was the one. It had to be. I took a step closer to get a better view; I had to be sure. With the stupid mood lighting or whatever it was, I couldn’t make out crap clearly from this distance. I needed to be close enough to read the inscription inside the sound hole and run my fingers over double the ivory angel wing inlays, but while it hung on the wall, that was impossible.
I snagged a stool and popped it underneath the display of the guitar, climbing on top of it after all four legs were on the floor. There was no time to waste. I had to move fast.
“Holy shit!” I murmured to myself, running my fingers along each of the glistening wings. I carefully lifted it from the hanger and placed my boots on the floor. After all the years of waiting to meet my biological mom, only to find she had already died, I had been gutted, to say the least. I thought holding the guitar would bring me some semblance of closeness, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth.
“Why the fuck didn’t you look for me?” I asked, reading the sappy words inside the opening of the acoustic guitar,“Angel, may love always live in your heart and guide your soul back to heaven when you lose your way.”I wondered what it wouldhave been like to be raised in their family, and for a split second, I allowed myself to really feel the blunt of the words. Maybe if she had kept me, I wouldn’t hate love and anything having to do with it. Perhaps I would have been in a healthy relationship with myself and wouldn’t be the fucked-up individual I was.