“Five more.”
“Oh God, I can’t… no more… please, daddy,” she begs.
“You can and you will.”
I don’t drag it out. I give her the last five hard and quick. When the last spank falls, she’s limp over my lap, all the fight drained out of her. Exactly what I wanted. What she needs. I lift her up and sit her on my lap. She wriggles as her freshly spanked ass comes in contact with my jeans.
“Are you ready to talk to me now?”
Instead of talking, she bursts into tears.
I hug her against my chest, and she wraps her arms around my neck, clinging to me like I’m the only safe spot in the eye of a storm. And with how she’s reacting right now, maybe I am.
“It’s okay, babygirl. Just breathe.”
She sucks in a hiccuping breath, but her sobbing doesn’t slow. I just hold her while she cries, letting her purge all her pent-up feelings. I don’t know how long we sit like that, but she finally slumps against me, all cried out.
“Talk to me. Tell me what’s eating at your heart.”
She sits up and looks at me with red-rimmed eyes. “I don’t even know where to start.”
I wipe the tear tracks from her cheeks. She rests her cheek against my hand, soaking up the affection.
“Start wherever you want to, babygirl. Just talk to me.”
“When I was pregnant with Henry, I was in a horrible car accident…” she hiccups a little sob. I hate myself a little for making her relive such a painful time in her life, but I know she needs to talk about it. She needs to let it out.
“My husband, William, died…” her eyes fall closed, and silent tears track down her cheeks again. “A drunk driver hit our car while we were on the way to my last doctor’s appointment. William was critically injured. Somehow, I escaped with only a head wound.”
Her hand goes to her forehead, and I see the light pink scar along her hairline that I never noticed before. I grab her hand and kiss her fingertips. Thanking God that he spared her. I could’ve lost her before I ever even knew she was out there in the world. I don’t interrupt her with words, though. Somehow, I know this isn’t the worst of her story.
“The stress from the accident caused me to go into labor… While William was fighting for his life on some operating table, I was delivering our baby by myself.” She swallows thickly, then wipes away more tears. “The doctor came in shortly after Henry was born and ripped my life apart. William died on the table. His injuries were too severe.
“I was in a bad place for a long time. My parents moved Henry and me into their house, and I hid in my grief, letting it consume me.”
“Of course you grieved. You lost your husband.”
She shakes her head. “I lost my husband, my best friend, and my daddy all in one.”
Her hesitation to start anything but a casual relationship is beginning to make more sense by the minute. No wonder she has tried to push me away and keep me at arm’s length. She lost everything when she lost her husband. I can’t imagine how hard it was to lose everything.
“Oh, babygirl.”
“That’s not the worst of it. I lost myself too. I was so consumed by my grief that I sunk into a pit of depression. My parents took over everything, including taking care of Henry. I missed so much of Henry’s life. I’m ashamed of myself for not being stronger for him.”
“You can’t do that to yourself. You were grieving…”
“That’s no excuse, and it’s why I moved to Monett and away from my parents. I needed to stand on my own two feet again. A fresh start.”
“And that’s why you have a rocky relationship with your parents?” I ask.
“My mom was furious that I decided to move. She didn’t see why I wanted to move so far away. She argued that moving into our own house should be enough. But I knew that wouldn’t work. She would’ve just tried to run my life from across town.”
“That was very brave of you. Moving so far away from your support system…”
She just shrugs. “It seemed like the right thing to do. Henry and I are in a good place. He’s healthy and happy.”
“And you?”