“Mommy, can we go to the park now?” Henry asks from my open doorway.
“In just a minute, buddy.”
“Guess that means our time is up,” Pelar says.
“Yep. I promised him another trip to the park.”
“Sounds like a blast. Keep me posted on your hottie bartender.”
“I will. Love you, girlie.”
“Love you too.”
* * *
I’m watchingHenry play in the sandbox with another little boy when my phone dings in my pocket. I pull it out, and Axel’s name shows on the notification.
Oh my God, he texted me again!
I quickly open the texting app so I can read what he sent.
Good morning, doll. Sleep well?
I feel a little flash of excitement at the fact that he texted again so soon. That must mean something. What if he really does ask me to play again? Ugh. I’m making too big a deal out of this whole thing. It’s just a freakin’ text message.
I slept fine.
Good. What are you doing today?
I look over at Henry, still playing with his little friend, and chew my lip, not knowing how to respond. I definitely don’t want to mix worlds. Henry is entirely off-limits.
Just hanging out. Doing laundry. Normal Sunday stuff. What about you?
It’s not a lie. I put a load in the wash before we left the apartment. And hanging out with Henry is normal everyday stuff. I can totally keep things separate. I can have a casual fling with a hot guy who is damn good at playing my daddy and be Henry’s mom.
Waiting around until it’s time to go to work.
Sounds like a blast.
And laundry is much better?
Touché.
“What’s got you smiling so big over here?” Sandra, one of the moms I chat with asks.
I put my phone back in my pocket and ignore the next ding. I can read it later. “Nothing. Just feeling happy today.”
She shakes her head. “You’re always happy. I don’t know how you do it. If I was a single parent, I would probably go insane. I swear by the time Rod gets home, I’m ready to hand the kids off and hide in the bathroom for a few hours.”
I just shrug, not having an answer for her. I never feel that way about Henry. I wonder if my losing William has just skewed my perspective. Either way, I wouldn’t change it. I love my life as a single mom. I never anticipated being one. William was my forever love, but he’s gone, and now I have to live the life I have.
I let Henry play until he’s yawning and obviously ready for his nap.
“See you later,” I say to Sandra and the other moms who have gathered around.
I know Henry is tired when he doesn’t protest us leaving. Usually he would put up some kind of fight, but he just lays his head on my shoulder and lets me carry him home. We wash up quickly, then I tuck him into bed for his nap.
“Love you, mommy,” he says in a sweet sleepy voice.