“No, and Dee has been tight-lipped about it any time I ask.”
Damn.“She has?”
“Yes. And since I didn’t want to put Dee in a position to choose between me or her friends, I didn’t bug her about it.”
I suck in a breath. “It’s complicated.”
“Complicated enough to drive you to drink?”
I shake my head. “No. I’m finding other ways to cope.”
“Like?”
“Well, I wasn’t allowed to build a boat in rehab because they were afraid I would get high off the glue or something, so I read.A lot.”
He rears back. “Wait. You can read?”
I give him a shove with my shoulder, which knocks him off-balance. He laughs, which only makes me break out into a chuckle too.
“What book did you like most?”
“Catcher in the Rye.”
His rubs his jaw. “I don’t feel like I appreciated that book as much as I should have when I read it in high school. Maybe I should give it a reread now that I’m an adult with more life experience.”
“Definitely. I think it’s a new favorite of mine.”
“What did you relate to most?”
“It’s hard to pick a particular theme, but maybe that I need to care about myself before prioritizing others.”
He nods. “And how’s that going?”
“Falling in love with yourself is ten times harder than falling in love with someone else, especially when I don’t like myself very much.”
“You’ll get there.”
“Did you used to feel that way?” I ask.
His gaze flickers across my face. “All the time.”
“How did you get past it?”
“By becoming someone I was proud of.”
We continue walking in silence. Delilah and Wyatt don’t live on the lake like we do, but their neighborhood is quaint and quiet, which makes it easy for me to get lost in my thoughts.
I’m not sure how long we walk for, but my calves are burning by the time we arrive back at their house. I’ve never had a sponsor before, so I’m not sure what to expect of the process, but a quiet walk wasn’t the first idea I had in mind.
Yet I feel more at peace than ever.
“See you tomorrow at AA?” Wyatt tucks his hands into his athletic shorts.
“Absolutely.”
Aknock on the door pulls me away from the show I was watching. I rise on to the tips of my toes and look through the peephole.
Oh God.