“Not like this, Antonella. You of all people should know how much it hurts her to see you this way.”
She looks away. “Fine.”
“Do you want me to book you a room at the motel?”
“Hell no. I’m going to crash on a friend’s couch who lives a few towns over.” Her hair flies from how hard she shakes her head.
“If that’s what you want. Just know that I meant what I said. If you need help, all you need to do is call me. But if you come back here again without being clean, I’ll make sure you never see your sister again.”
She turns toward her rundown car packed to the roof with boxes and personal belongings. It’s sad to see the mess her life has become.
I wish I could help her, but I need to protect Lana first and foremost.
I check on Cami before knocking my fist against the locked bathroom door. “Lana?”
“Is she gone?”
“Yeah. I waited until her car drove off before coming back inside.”
“Thank you.” Her sniffle is soft but audible, making my muscles tighten.
My hand chokes the doorknob. “Open up for me.”
“I’d rather not.”
“Please.”
Her heavy sigh is followed by the flick of the lock. I open the door to find Lana sitting on the floor with her arms wrapped around her legs.
“Hey.” I kneel beside her and pull her into my arms. “It’s going to be okay.”
“I thought I would be used to this by now.” Her fingers wrap around the cotton fabric of my shirt.
“Used to what?”
“The disappointment.” Her chin trembles.
“I’m sorry.” The words leave my mouth in a rush.
She shifts her gaze to the floor. “It’s not your fault Antonella is the way she is.”
“No, it’s not. But I’m sorry for being another person who let you down because I was too selfish to do anything else.”
Some of the tension bleeds from her muscles as she releases a heavy sigh.
“Seeing your sister…shit. I understand her and where she is coming from, but I also want to shake her for hurting you and Cami like she has.”
Her nails dig into my skin. “Does being grateful that she gave Cami up make me a bad person?”
“No, Lana. It makes you human.” My arms around her tighten. “Antonella is in no position to look after a child. And you… You were born to be that little girl’s mother.”
She looks up at me with tear-soaked lashes and glassy eyes. “You think so?”
“I’ve never been more certain of anything.”
Fixa house, Iris said.
It’ll be fun, she said.