“I love LeBron, but he lives down in Los Angeles, and you arehere,” she said. “Then she stood up and walked over to Jordan. “I wantmanybabies. Do you know who can give them to her, hmm?”
Jordan looked like a deer caught in the headlights as Mom cackled and patted him on the cheek. She even gave one of his arms a squeeze and said, “Strong babies! Very strong!” before resuming focusing on Anthony.
I cringed through the whole thing. “That’s enough, Mom.”
“What?” She gestured at him. “He is big and strong. Very good. I approve.” She turned toward him. “I approve, fire man! Take my daughter!”
I let out a long, embarrassed groan.
Derek allowed Mom to stay for half an hour. We went into the living room and she played with him on the floor. When Jordan tried to turn the TV to a replay of last night’s Giants game, Mom snapped at him and insisted that we play the Dodgers instead. Jordan changed the channel without a fuss.
“Mom may only be a hundred pounds, but she gets what she wants,” I whispered to him. “It’s best not to fight her.”
“I can see that.”
Eventually Derek cleared his throat and made some comments about needing to clean up the firehouse. Mom took the hint and finally got up off the floor.
“I bring you food later,” she said. “No charge. A thank you for playing with the baby.”
“That’s real nice of you,” Derek said. “But we’ll insist on paying.”
She ignored him and patted Jordan’s cheek. “My daughter loves bringing you the Friday order. When you call, she makes the giggle face!”
“Ugh,Mom. Stop it!”
Taylor grinned. “I want to hear all about the giggle face, Mrs. Ricci.”
“Mom has to open the restaurant,” I said, ushering her out the front door. “Lots of prep-work to do before lunch.”
She made an annoyed sound. “Restaurant does not need me so much. Nobody comes for lunch.”
Derek cleared his throat. “Is business not so great, Mrs. Ricci?”
“It had a few people in it the last time I was there!” Taylor said hopefully. “I mean, I guess it was just two, but still…”
Before Mom could tell them all about the restaurant’s money problems, I continued pushing her toward the door. “Thanks Mom, love you, bye.”
The guys were all smiles when I returned to the kitchen. “Grandbabies, huh?” Jordan asked.
“Don’t start,” I warned.
Taylor playfully squeezed Jordan’s bicep. “So strong!”
“You’re just jealous she likes me,” Jordan said.
“It seems to me she doesn’t want a son-in-law,” Derek said. “She wants a sperm donor for her daughter. You just happen to be her best chance.”
“Or so she thinks,” Taylor said with a smile. “Wonder what she would think of this whole arrangement.”
“We’re going tokeepwondering,” I cut in forcefully, “because she’s never going to find out. We’re lucky it was Jordan hugging me by the sink when she walked in. If it was one of you two, I don’t know how I would have explained it.”
“I like her!” Taylor said. “For such a small woman, she’s got a whole bucketload of attitude. I bet she was even feistier when she was young.”
“Contrary to what you might think, she’s gotten more feisty with age.” I took Anthony out of his bassinet and checked his diaper. “And she won’t be satisfied until she has an entire Italian soccer team worth of grandchildren.”
“I bet she’d like all three of us, then!” Taylor insisted. “More guys dating you means more chances for…”
He trailed off at a glare from me.