Addi and Bella left, and Lex closed her suitcase and checked, yet again, that she had everything she needed. She picked up her case and looked at her reflection in the freestanding mirror, cocking her head to the side. She could see this person with Cole in his usual, rich-as-Croesus life. She looked sophisticated and successful, cool and competent. Classy. She didn’t look like a curly-haired chauffeur, a harried young woman raising two little girls or a part-time student. She looked like someone had waved a wand and made her...chic.
When Joelle had got her to change her looks, she’d gone to extreme lengths and had continued bleaching her hair and wearing thick make-up. Then, since she’d embraced her natural look, she’d never worn anything but a little mascara and lip gloss. Maybe she could find some middle ground. Straightening her hair every day would be impossible, but maybe she could start wearing tinted moisturiser, a little eye-shadow and this gorgeous shade of lipstick.
As for her clothes, while she wasn’t a ‘dress up and look smart’ kind of girl, maybe she could start wearing something other than black jeans, long-sleeved T-shirts and vintage jackets. She should start introducing a little more colour and variety into her life. She was allowed to experiment with her looks, to dress up or down, to wear make-up or not. She was allowed to swap things around, try something new. It wasn’t as if she was hiding behind a thick foundation and bright-blonde hair any more.
She could change her looks without changing herself.
Lex grinned. She was having a bit of a Cinderella moment, but instead of going to the ball in a carriage she’d be flying on a private plane and going to a garden party.
As if she’d summoned him, the doorbell chimed downstairs. Her driver was here.
She slung her bag over her shoulder and grabbed the handle. Her smile split her face as excitement danced up and down her spine.
Lex was about to embark on her truly excellent adventure.
Mr Thorpe, your brother requests your presence in Thailand. He has received special dispensation from the head monk to meet with you Saturday afternoon. He needs to tell you about Charlie. If you miss this opportunity, he does not know when, if ever, he will be able to meet with you again.
Sitting in his car outside Lex’s cottage, Cole looked at the email from Sam’s lawyer again and cursed. He’d received it as he touched down in Cape Town just an hour ago, earlier than he’d expected. The email was brief, but it felt as if every word was imbued with urgency. So Sam knew who this Charlie was and now felt the need to share the knowledge with him.
Good of him.
Cole was tempted to blow off his brother’s request and whisk Lex off to Paris as he’d planned. Man, he’d missed her. He’d missed her laughter, the way she turned to him in her sleep and draped her thigh over his and placed her hand on his heart. He missed her clothes next to his in the wardrobe, the smell of her hair, the way she looked at him, her deep-green eyes glinting with affection and desire.
And he missed the sex. He really missed making love to her.
But if he didn’t go to Thailand, if he ignored Sam’s request, he’d never know who Charlie was and he knew, somewhere deep down, that whatever Sam had to tell him would fill in many of the blanks, would give him the answers he’d always sought.
He glanced at Lex’s cottage, frowning as he tried to work out how to make this work.
He could change their plans, take her to Thailand and leave her on a beach while he visited his brother. But he knew that afterwards he would tell her what had happened between Sam and him, how he felt and what emotions he was experiencing. She’d hold his hand, lean her head on his shoulder and he wouldn’t feel so alone.
If she did that, he’d pull the cork from the damn dyke and all his emotions would flood out and drown him. He’d say way more than he should—that he adored her, that he couldn’t bear the thought of leaving Cape Town and her behind, that he wanted them to...
What? Have a long-distance relationship? Be his lover? Be his significant other, his girlfriend, his wife...hissomething?
Practically, realistically, they had too many obstacles to overcome. He only needed to visit Cape Town and Port Louis, the capital city of Mauritius, once, maybe twice, more before he’d manage to rid himself of all Thorpe Industries assets and businesses. He could see Lex then, but after those two brief trips he wouldn’t be returning to Africa any time soon. He’d been giving his hedge fund and his venture capital business minimal time lately. He’d employed analysts to help him with his workload but he needed to take full control again. He missed his real work, the adrenalin of making massive stock buys, finding new companies to invest in and grow.
And then there was the issue of her sisters. Lex was raising two little girls and it would be disingenuous to suggest that her being the equivalent of a single mum wasn’t a factor. If they were together, he’d have to share her time, attention and energy with her younger sisters, and at the very least be a role model to them. He couldn’t see himself sharing Lex and living in a noisy house with two young girls when he was so very used to being on his own in his tidy and quiet house.
He’d never had a father, or much of an older brother, so how could he be either to her sisters?
Another obstacle was that Lex’s life was here, in Cape Town. And, while he had all the money in the world to pay for her to fly to see him, or he to see her, he knew that a long-distance relationship, seeing each other occasionally, wasn’t something she’d contemplate. And wouldn’t having little bites of time with her—a weekend here, a week there—make the times they spent apart harder to endure?
Cole sighed, knowing that he’d exhausted the practicalities and had to get down to the nitty-gritty of what was keeping him from forming a solid attachment to Lex.
Just get on with it, Thorpe, you’ve played this song before.
A core truth was that he’d made connections with women before and thought he’d met someone special. He’d tiptoe into a relationship but within a few weeks, sometimes a couple of months, he’d always end up feeling trapped, desperate to run.
Right now, he was besotted with Lex, couldn’t touch her enough, wanted to make love to her constantly, hated being away from her, felt the need to be near her, talking to her, and having her fall asleep in his arms. He could see her rounded with his child, having a house filled with two little girls and their children running around, loud, messy and full of laughter and love. A house and life that would be the antithesis of his cold and lonely childhood.
But he’d had dreams before—though not this bright and vivid—and knew that feeling like this never lasted. In a month or two—maybe longer, because Lex entranced him like no other woman had before—he’d cool down, pull away. She’d have questions and he wouldn’t be able to explain why he felt the need to run.
In his twenties, he’d put his failed relationships down to choosing the wrong woman, timing and mistaking sex for love. Now that he was older, he knew he was the problem, because he wanted something they couldn’t give.
And he was doing it again.
Because no matter how much he adored her, how close he came to falling in love with her, she could never give him enough or what he really wanted—love and acceptance. No, that was wrong. She couldn’t give him his father’s love and acceptance.