That was part of it. He was trying to make her feel more comfortable with him. His sadness sort of teased hers out, made the memories start to creep in. Made her remember the reasons why she was hesitating with this man that was so tempting, so intriguing. Despite her doubts it was sort of working and she wanted to just open herself and be vulnerable to him.
No matter that at times that thought scared her.
But she slammed it, pushing the past where it belonged. Far away from this otherworldly balcony surrounded by Conrad’s past on one side and his rock-solid, hot body on the other. He tasted so good, like something exotic and addicting. She admitted she wanted more. Of his kisses, of his body, of everything he’d offer her.
She had the feeling deep in her gut that these moments with Conrad were fleeting. That any real chance of him staying with her wasn’t realistic. But at the same time, he was offering her something no other man could. A chance to reclaim a part of her femininity that she’d been afraid of for much too long.
He lifted his head, staring down into her eyes, and she wanted to be cool. Wanted to make it seem as if this was just a hot kiss and there weren’t a million other emotions rolling through her, but she knew she didn’t pull it off when he rubbed his thumb over her bottom lip and gave her a knowing smile.
“I think we’ve seen enough of my family,” he said. “So next stop is up to you. Library or the gardens?” he asked.
She was disappointed at how relieved she was that he’d made this moment normal. But at the same time, this was one of the things that made it hard for her not to fall for Conrad. Her mind was blaring the wordtemporary, but her heart and soul felt this connection that seemed eternal.
“Library first,” she said. “I’m going to be fully disappointed if it isn’t at least floor-to-ceiling and doesn’t have a ladder.”
“Oh, you’ll have to wait and see,” he said, leading her away from the rotunda. Before they stepped off the walkway, she stopped him.
“Is this where the ball was?”
She felt almost as if a curtain had come down between them. He gave her a tight-lipped nod.
“It’s so pretty. I bet it looked nice that night,” she said carefully. She was backpedaling, trying not to push too hard, but that kiss had blown past the barriers that she’d thought she’d put in place. And even if he was temporary...would it really hurt to ask the hard questions?
“It was. You can see it from here if you look closely—there are a bunch of fiber-optic lights in the ceiling that make it look like twinkling stars,” he said.
“Sounds magical,” she observed. If she pushed for anything else, he’d shut her out completely. “Like the perfect night for a curse to be born.”
“Probably,” he said. “I guess that makes my grandfather some sort of evil wizard.”
“Maybe, or maybe a jealous witch put a spell on the castle and everyone in it.”
“It’s a manor house,” he pointed out.
“You just said it was magical.”
“Did I say that? Seems more like you were the one going for the magic angle.”
“Well this is way more castle-like than any house I’ve lived in,” she said.
“I’ll allow it.”
She lightly punched his shoulder, delighted at the resistance of his solid muscles. She pulled her hand back. “Do you work out?”
He started laughing and shook his head. “Yes. If I don’t then I fall into bad habits.”
“Like?”
“Indulging your questions,” he said.
“I know you count on those kinds of responses to shut me up, but it won’t work,” she said. “Did your dad grow up here?”
“He did. Dash and Rory’s father was his twin,” he said.
“When did his mom die?” she asked. “I’m wondering if that’s what happened to change your grandfather.”
“Don’t try to make him human to me.”
She took a deep breath. This was pushing in a way that she couldn’t justify. She should leave it alone. But she liked Conrad, she wanted him and he was making her think of things that she hadn’t dreamed of in a long time. So that meant she was going to have to take a few risks.