I look into her eyes, a profound sense of loss washing over me. “I’ve said nice things to you before. I always compliment you on your work.”
“Yes,” she admits. “But you’ve never complimented me as a person. The only time you ever commented on my character—” she shakes her head and takes a sip of her drink instead. “It doesn’t matter.”
I turn to face her and take her drink out of her hand before placing it on the coffee table. “It does matter,” I tell her. “I never intended to hurt you, Valentina. What I said to you at Raven and Ares’s wedding was inappropriate and unacceptable, and I…” I bury my face in my hands for a moment and inhale deeply. “Valentina, I genuinely regret saying and doing what I did. I lost my temper and acted like a fucking fool. I didn’t mean to hurt you, or to make you feel inferior in any way. You aren’t. Hell, we both know I’m nothing without you.”
She shakes her head and picks her drink back up. “Let’s not talk about that, Luca,” she says, shaking her head. “I promise you that it’s fine.We’refine. Tell me instead how you are. Are you okay?”
I run a hand through my hair and inhale deeply. “I’m not sure. I didn’t… I didn’t see this coming.”
Valentina takes another sip of her drink and nods. “Natalia is stunning,” she says, her voice soft. “The two of you will look great together.”
Bitterness settles deep in my stomach. I expected her to be somewhat hurt or jealous, but she isn’t.
“I know she’s young, and she seems somewhat immature, but that’s the beauty of marriage, isn’t it? You’ll grow together. Thetwo of you will adapt to each other’s lives. It’ll all work out, I’m sure. Your grandmother would not have chosen her for you if that wasn’t the case.”
I should be grateful that she’s finally talking to me again, that the atmosphere between us is the same as it used to be, but I don’t want it to be. Not under these circumstances. I don’t want her to console me — I want her to be angry and jealous. I want her to lash out at me so I can pull her close and kiss her until she melts into me.
I look into her beautiful hazel eyes, my heart aching. Is no part of her bothered by the thought of me marrying Natalia?
I suppose not.
Why would she be?
Chapter Twelve
Valentina
“Val?”
I look up, surprised to find Theo Miller, one of our fund managers, standing by my desk. “I’m sorry,” I tell him. “I was lost in thought and didn’t notice you standing there. God, I’m so sorry. What can I do for you?”
He smiles at me sweetly and shakes his head. It’s clear he’s been standing here a while, but I didn’t even notice him. I need to pull myself together.
“There was an error in the report I sent you, so I printed a new copy for you ahead of the meeting. I hope I’m in time?”
I glance at my watch and nod. “We have about forty minutes left. I can’t thank you enough for catching and correcting that so swiftly.”
He shakes his head bashfully. “I never should have made a mistake in the first place. If the boss caught it, my job would’ve been at risk. You know what he’s like.”
I smile ruefully and nod, the mere thought of Luca bringing a frown to my face.
“Are you okay, Val?” Theo asks. “In all the years I’ve known you, an error like the one today has never slipped past you. If there’s anything I can do for you, I’m always here.”
I force a smile for him. “I just haven’t been sleeping well, and it’s impacting me during the day. Maybe I’m just a little overworked?”
Theo throws me an understanding smile, his gaze lingering on me for a moment before he walks away.
I haven’t been myself since Luca’s engagement announcement last week, and even my colleagues are starting to notice. I need to do better.
I keep trying to convince myself that I don’t care, and that I’m happy for him, when nothing could be further from the truth.
Every night, my mind has been tormenting me with images of him with Natalia, warping my memories until all I can see is him touching her the way he touched me.
When I close my eyes, I hear him whispering into her ear, telling her to look at no one but him. Just thinking of him holding Natalia that way, his eyes filled with the same desire he once felt for me… it fills me with unwarranted jealousy.
I inhale shakily and try my hardest to clear my mind, to no avail. Things have been different between us in recent days, more friendly in a way, yet more distant than ever before. It’s as though his engagement allowed us to finally put our argument behind us, and it’s bittersweet. I should be grateful for it, but instead it leaves me feeling lonely in a way I never have before.
My phone buzzes, and I glance at it reluctantly. Sierra and Raven have been texting me incessantly, wanting to discuss the engagement, but I’m not sure what to say. I never told them what happened between Luca and me, and the more time passes, the harder it becomes to speak up. Now I’m stuck having to actsupportive and happy for him, when each mention of Natalia chips away at my tattered heart.