My only worry is that it’s no longer me she wants. If Alanna really is happy with Ryan, can I truly take away that happiness? Can I knowingly break her heart because of my own selfish desires?
ChapterThirty-One
Alanna
I stare up at the entwined double S on the building in front of me, wondering whether I should just walk away. I was so excited about this interview just a few weeks ago. The idea of working with Ryan at the company that bears his surname was amazing.
Now? Now I’m second-guessing myself. I’ve embarrassed myself in front of Silas enough now. The last thing I want to do is run into him again.
Not that I would. The building has twenty-seven floors. Surely the CEO doesn’t sit in on graduate interviews?
I take a deep breath and force myself to walk into the building. I’d be crazy not to attend this interview just on the off chance I might run into Silas. Sinclair Security is my dream company. I’ve wanted to work for them long before I even met Ryan.
“Good morning, Ms. Jones,” the lady behind the receptionist counter says before I can even tell her what I’m here for. My eyes widen, a thrill running down my spine. I’ve heard rumors about the staff here. They’re what I always imagined the FBI would be like — except privatized.
I look around for a name card, but there isn’t one. I nod politely, wondering whether this is a test. Should I have known her name too?
She smiles as though she can read my mind. “I’m Amy, and I’d honestly be quite upset if you knew that, because it’d mean I wasn’t doing my job.” She winks at me as she rises from her seat and guides me toward the elevators.
Her kind smile puts me at ease and I listen attentively as she tells me about the security measures in place at the elevator. “Fingerprint scans are sufficient for the lower floors, but any floor above fourteen requires a retinal scan,” she says as she leans into the scanner.
I only barely manage to contain my excitement. I knew Sinclair Security was high tech, but this is better than I even imagined. Amy presses the button for the top floor, and I blink in surprise as unease washes over me.
The top floor for graduate interviews… surely not. My suspicions are confirmed when she leads me through the quiet floor, until we’re standing in front of a corner office — one fit for a CEO.
“You’ll do great,” she tells me as she knocks on the door. “I have no doubt that we’ll be working together soon.”
She opens the door and takes a step back to let me pass. I hesitate, taking a moment to gather my courage and push down the dread that threatens to overwhelm me.
My stride is confident as I walk into the office, finding Silas sitting behind a large black desk. He looks up and smiles politely, his expression completely professional. I’m nervous as I sit down opposite him, but I’d like to think I managed to keep my cool.
Silas glances at a document in front of him, and I quickly realize that it’s my resume. “Tell me, why do you think you’d be a good fit for Sinclair Security?”
I stare at him in surprise. Is he serious? He can’t seriously be conducting my interview himself, can he? I force myself to get it together and answer the question the way I practiced.
“I… I’ve followed the growth of Sinclair Security for years now. I’m aware you started with private investigations and ended up growing this business to encompass security of all types, including cybersecurity. The research you do and the company’s trajectory are astonishing. I think Sinclair Security will become even more of a powerhouse than it currently is, and I’d love to be part of it.”
It’s true. I truly admire this company and all he’s done with it. It might be near impossible to find information on him online, but I hear the rumors from the industry experts I know. This company is astonishing and barely anyone even knows it even exists.
“You specifically applied to be part of the Ψ division, even though it’s the toughest division to get into. If you did your research at all, you’ll know that we mostly hire internally for this division. Why did you apply here instead of the other departments that are much easier to access?”
I look down at my hands for a moment, startled by the question. “I’m intrigued by the secrecy surrounding this department, and I love a good challenge. The opportunity to work with some of the brightest minds in the country isn’t one I could let slip by, even if my chances of joining are slim.”
He stares at me as though he knows I’m lying and shakes his head. “Tell me the full truth, Alanna.”
I look into his eyes, finding encouragement in them. “I don’t know,” I whisper truthfully. “I don’t know, Silas. All I know is that I belong here. When I first heard of the Ψ division, I just knew. That makes no sense, and I know that it doesn’t, but it is the truth. I feel like I’ll find the answers I’m seeking here.”
“What answers are you seeking?” he asks, his voice soft.
“I’m looking for someone,” I admit. “Someone I keep dreaming of. I can’t keep this from you because I know you’ll do a full background check before you’ll even consider hiring me, but I suffer from amnesia. Despite that, there’s someone I keep dreaming of. I don’t know who it is, but I feel like someone out there is waiting for me. I have no intention of using corporate resources to find this person. Please don’t misunderstand. I just… I just feel like being here gets me a step closer.”
He stares at me, and for a moment, I’m certain he’ll ask me to leave his office and never return, shredding my resume in the process. Instead, he nods and proceeds to ask me basic interview questions. Much to my relief, the interview proceeds that way, with Silas asking questions I’ve prepared for.
Just when I think I’m in the clear, Silas drops his pen on top of my resume and stares me down. “Have you wanted to work here since before you met Ryan?”
The personal question throws me off. He’s been so professional since I walked in here that he made it easy to forget what he told me. If he doesn’t think I’m good enough to be with his brother, why would he think I’m good enough for his company?
“That’s right,” I tell him, unsure what else to say.