I stare at the tombstones in front of me, feeling conflicted. “I’m still mad at both of you. Every day, I still wonder if there’s anything I could’ve done, or something I should have said. Some days I wonder if maybe I just wasn’t enough for you, Mom. And Dad? I still feel like I failed you. Doing what you did, making me give you up in return formoney? The fact that you even considered it at all makes me wonder how terrible of a daughter I must have been for you to think that’s something I could live with.” I sniff as fresh tears roll down my face. I’ve been crying most days since I regained my memories, but it’s been bittersweet. The past might hold a lot of pain, but it holds just as much love. “The man you hired… he upheld his end of the bargain as best as he could, even after all of your plans fell apart. He paid for my education, Dad. If not for Silas, I’d never have known, and I figured… I figured telling you that would help you rest easier. I wish you’d never done it, but you should know it wasn’t all in vain.” I inhale shakily and run a hand through my hair. “I’m hurt, and I’m angry, but I still love you. I still miss you, and there still isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to see both of you one more time.”
Silas raises our joined hands to his lips and kisses the back of my hand, his expression pained. “Per aspera ad astra,” he tells me. “I know it hurts, and you don’t have to forgive them immediately, but don’t let the pain poison you, Ray. This, too, is one of the hardships that turned you into the person you are today. You and I have been immersed in misery, but because of anddespiteit, we’ve come as far as we did. Through adversity, we reached the stars.”
I nod and smile up at him. He’s right, of course. He always is. “I’m not sure who I would be without you, Si. Adversity may have shaped us, but love did, too. I love you, Silas Sinclair. Today, and every day to come.”
The way he smiles at me has my heart racing as we walk over to his parents’ tombstones. “I had my father’s ashes buried next to mother,” he tells me as we pause in front of them. “So they could be together at last. A few years ago, I found out that my father had purchased the plot next to mother, much like your father did. This was my way of honoring the wish he never voiced.”
I hold his hand as Silas greets his parents before turning to me. “This is the woman I’m going to marry,” he says, and my heart skips a beat. “I’ve already asked her to marry me, but she thought I was joking. I wasn’t. It’s okay though, I’ll try again, and again, until she says yes. Her name is Alanna, but I call her Ray. Sometimes, when she’s acting a little crazy, I call hermy little psycho. She’s sweet and smart and beautiful, and you would have loved her so much.”
I lean into him, the biggest smile on my face. It’s strange to be here, in the same place we met, so many years later. Life nearly tore us apart, but we made it. Through adversity, we made it.
“Dad,” Silas says, his tone regretful. “When you passed away, I made you a promise. I told you that I’d take care of Ryan in your stead, that I’d protect him from Mona, and that no harm would come to him.” He inhales shakily and runs a hand through his hair. “I’m going to have to break that promise. I hope you’ll forgive me. I’ve done my best, Dad. I’ve given him as many chances as I could, but I’m done. I can’t save him when he’s the one that’s knowingly and willingly walking down this path. I’m sorry.”
Silas wraps his arm around me, and I look up at him. The pain I see in his gaze tears me apart, even more so because I know I played a part in it too. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to make up for everything he’s had to endure. That’s the tricky thing about memories. The ones we most want to forget will forever haunt us, and the ones we want to hang onto fade day by day.
“What are you going to do?”
Silas inhales deeply and tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. “What I should have done long ago.”
ChapterEighty-One
Silas
I suspected this day would come, but I’ve done everything in my power to keep it from happening. I was even willing to overlook the harm his mother did me, letting the lawyer walk instead of detaining him, but I should have known better.
I should have realized that Ryan needs to learn how to handle the consequences of his actions, the way I had to. Shielding him from everything the way I did only allowed his mother to bury her claws into him that much deeper, taking him beyond salvation.
I stand by the choice I’m making today, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I glance at the police officer next to me and nod, standing back as he knocks on Mona’s door.
Ryan opens the door, and regret hits me hard. I know this is going to hurt him, but I’m done burying the truth for his benefit. “Silas? What is the meaning of this?”
Mona appears behind him and Officer Davis glances at me. He and I have worked together on cases Sinclair Security has provided consultancy services for, but today is more of a personal favor. I nod at him, and he straightens.
“Mona Wright, you are under arrest on account of forgery of your husband’s will.” Ryan’s eyes widen as Officer Davis reads out her rights to her, and she sends her son a panicked look, but Ryan is looking at me.
“It’s really true?” he asks, his voice breaking.
I nod. “You know it is.”
“Ryan! Do something! Please, tell your brother to stop this. It’s all part of his vendetta against us. He’s just doing this to hurt us, Ry. This is what he’s like. Please, talk some sense into him. Don’t let him do this to me.”
He glances at his mother and takes a step back. Mona freezes in surprise, her gaze moving toward me. “What did you tell him?” she asks, her tone harsh.
“Nothing. I didn’t have to, Mona. You did this all by yourself. I would’ve let it go, you know? For Ryan, I would have spared you. You fucked up when you touched Alanna. Even then, I let it go, knowing Ryan wasn’t in on it. You should’ve counted your lucky stars and let it be once she came back to me. You never should have tried to use her to get to my assets. If you’d stayed away from her, you’d have been left with the money I paid you to acquire what you lost. Now? Now you’ll lose everything, the way I once did.”
Officer Davis leads her away, and Ryan watches her without a word. “We have the lawyer’s taped confession, but he’s told me he kept evidence too, in case she didn’t pay him his share after the deed was done. He’s willing to turn it in to lessen his own forgery sentence. She’s going to jail, Ryan.”
He nods and looks down at his feet. “I’m sorry, Silas. I didn’t see it at the time. I didn’t realize that my own mother was manipulating me to hurt you. Even when you pointed it out, I refused to acknowledge it and continued to hurt you. I know what I’ve done to you, to Alanna.” He runs a hand through his hair and stares up at the sky. “After I ripped up the papers you signed, I confronted my mother, and she told me the report she’d given me was false. I should’ve known then that she must have lied about more than just that. It doesn’t make anything right, but I truly thought I was protecting Alanna by warning her against you. The reports were just so… I guess it was convenient for me to believe it. It was easier than believing that she simply chose you over me, that I’d lost the one girl I’ve ever loved. But you were right when you told me that she was never mine. I see it now, and nothing I do or say will ever make up for the pain I’ve caused.”
I look away, a small part of me still struggling to cut ties with my brother. “No,” I tell him. “Nothing ever will.” I take a step away from him. “I told you that the moment I signed those papers, I’d also be cutting my ties with you. Those words still hold true, Ryan. I understand that your mother fed you elaborate lies, but you aren’t a child anymore. When I showed you that picture of Alanna and me and asked you to stop hurting her, to stop messing with her memories, you should have listened to me. I’ve let you do whatever you wanted, giving you chance after chance. I did it because I made Dad a promise, and I stuck to it until you gave me no other choice, even at my own expense.”
I look away and inhale deeply. “I need you to hand in the keys of the apartment I gave you, Ryan. I’ve already blocked your access to all of my accounts, and I’m taking my cars back, too. Everything I’ve done for you stops here. The only thing I’ll let you keep is your job.”
He looks down at his feet and nods, his expression somber. Ryan hands me his keys without putting up a fight, and I breathe a sigh of relief. I don’t have it in me to keep arguing with him. I’m just done with it all.
“Someday, Silas… do you think you and I can be like we used to be?”
I look at my little brother, wondering the same. “I don’t know,” I tell him honestly. “I’d like to think that that’s possible, but as it stands, I don’t trust you around my family. I can’t forgive you for the way you hurt Alanna, even if she does.”