I nodded.
“Have you been living here?”
“Yeah.”
“Wow. You haven’t told me anything.”
“I know, but I didn’t know how to say it. I barely understand it myself. Sometimes in the middle of the night, I wake up in a panic, sitting straight up on the mattress. Only to be slapped in the face with the illusion of a man who isn’t in there.”
“Your stalker?”
“No.”
“Oh…”
“Yeah.”
“Do you love him?”
“No.”
“No?”
“I don’t know.”
“I see.”
“I don’t think you do. He broke my heart, and I can’t forgive him.”
“So you’re punishing him?”
“No. Wait.” I glanced up in the air. “Am I?”
“Sounds like you’re punishing him. Maybe you need to figure that out. But in the meantime, you might as well try to accept that he’s in your life until your contract is up. You need to find some middle ground. Maybe try getting to know him again. Become friends. The best relationships stem from strong friendships.”
“What about Cade?”
“The brother, right?”
“Yeah.”
“I thought you said he hasn’t been in your life for a decade?”
“He hasn’t.”
“Then maybe this is the best time to have Adrian in yours?”
“Right…”
“You need to give him a chance and stop pushing him away. Look at everything he’s doing for you. You can’t continue on this way, it’s not healthy. You’re only digging yourself into an early grave, and I’m talking emotionally.”
I inhaled a ragged breath, knowing she was right. “I don’t know if I believe in love anymore, Belle.”
She peered around her phone, her gaze catching the framed picture on his nightstand.
“Is that his brother?”
“Yeah.”
“The Drake blood makes some handsome men.”
“I know.”
“Do you know anything about Cade?”
“He married his college sweetheart, and they have two kids.”
“What aren’t you telling me?”
“He named his baby girl after me. It’s her birthday next week.”
“Sounds like he hasn’t forgotten about you either.”
“That’s what Adrian says.”
“Maybe you should start listening to him.”
“You don’t know what you’re asking.”
“I know more than anyone knows what you’re going through.”
Her and Tristian managed to find their way back to each other, despite the odds against them.
“From an outsider looking in, just staring at the photo… There’s a lot of history there, Paige.”
“Maybe Adrian came back into your life for more than just protecting you against this stalker.”
I shook my head. “He doesn’t love me.”
“How do you know?”
I thought back on that day. The evening everything between us came to a head. Over ten years, and it still haunted me.
Cade’s hurt.
Adrian’s words.
My heart…
I lost both of the men who ever meant anything to me. All in one shot. I couldn’t forgive Adrian. It was too hard.
Not when he looked me right in the face.
“He told me he didn’t love me.”
Adrian
“Shit, man.” Adrian shook his head with wide eyes.
We were in my office, and I just finished catching him up on everything. Trying to see if he had any suggestions on where to go from here.
“Does she have any enemies? Ex boyfriends?”
“Not any that are psychopaths.”
“What about ex bosses? A fight with a former girlfriend? Done anything to piss someone off?”
“None that want her dead.”
“You think that’s what they’re after?”
“I’m not sure, but I’m not going to sit around and find out. I want this motherfucker in jail or dead and I’d prefer the latter.”
“Fair enough. I can only imagine what you’re going through. I’m so sorry, Adrian. If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. But it sounds like you’ve covered all your grounds. I mean…” He paused. “Have you reached out to your brother?”
“What do you mean?”
“Does he know about what happening to Paige?”
“No. He has no idea that she’s back in my life.”
I could tell just by the look on his face he was going to say something I didn’t want to hear.
“I hate to break it to you, man, but you’re going to have to involve him. If they were as close as you’re saying they were, he’s probably going to know a hell of a lot more than you do about her.”
I grimaced. I couldn’t help it. Hearing him admit that truth to me was a hard pill to swallow. Which had always been the biggest problem for me when it came to us. It always felt like no matter how many times I was with her or inside of her, it would never compare to what my brother already knew about her.
At the end of the day, she’d always be his best friend.
It didn’t matter how long we were together. I’d forever be competing for her, and I couldn’t live like that. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us.
I walked away from her because I had to.
I broke her heart because there was no other way.
I was the bad guy, and she was my cherry girl.
As much as I hated to admit it, Tristian was right.
“I can see this is killing you, Adrian. I know how stressed you are. I know how hard it is to get the woman you destroyed to love you again, but it doesn’t mean she won’t. Trust me. I see the way she looks at you. She’s still in love with you. She’s just not ready to admit it to herself. It’s easier to push you away than it is to forgive you.”