My emotions are like a light switch; on for anger and off for sad. I want to dig up Angelo Miller’s grave and burn him up all over again. But I’m also heartbroken because I can sense where this is going.
“He liked to get me to burn the kids. It turned him on. That’s how I met Cas.”
Tears spring down my face in waves. My boys. My beautiful boys.
Lorne laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “Cas was probably his biggest mistake. He was the one who gave me courage. He bit my father’s dick off and spat it in his face. Angelo didn’t know what hit him. He screamed at me to get someone, but Cas just looked at me and calmly asked if I had any accelerant.”
“Lorne.” My voice emerges as a strangled whisper.
He grips my wrist as I lift my hand to his face and growls, “Don’t do that. Don’t feel sorry for me. I’m not helpless. I went through shit. Everyone goes through shit. Two people I love more than life have gone through much worse.”
“I don’t pity you, Lorne. I want to comfort you because I care about you. I’m glad you killed him. Did … Did he ever touch you?”
“Did he fuck me? No. I was there to torture. He made me watch. I’d get hard, and I assumed I was a sick fuck like him. Cas was the first kid he tried to get me to burn. He liked to burn me while he made the other kids”—his Adam’s apple bobs as he pushes his palms into his eyes—“do things. Horrible things.”
I want to hug him, to cradle him in my arms and love him. To show him he deserves better.
“Sometimes, he’d put me in a choke hold and cut off my airway. Occasionally, I’d pass out. But the worst part was that I thought I liked it. It wasn’t until Cas that I understood my physical reaction didn’t constitute consent.”
Suddenly, he jumps off the pew bench, his expression distraught. “Jesus! Fuck! Did we rape you?”
He falls to his knees in front of me, his head buried in my lap. “I’m sorry, Snow. I’m so sorry. We have a hard time with it all. We can’t grasp what’s okay and isn’t. But you were making it better. I could see it. The fucked up thing is that I can’t even promise it won’t happen again. Jesus, no wonder you ran away.”
“Don’t apologize for something you don’t believe you did wrong. You can sit here and say sorry, but you don’t mean it. The truth is, I didn’t say no then and I won’t now. Or ever.”
He rises, his gaze searching mine. “I need you.” The words are full of longing and desperation.
He grabs my nape and tugs me to the floor. My hands work as if on autopilot, unbuckling his belt and lowering the zipper of his navy wool dress pants to unleash his mammoth cock.
He grips his girth with one hand, slapping me in the face with it. “Be a good girl for your new brother and open wide.”
This is obscene. We’re in a place of worship. This is sacrilegious and wrong in so many ways. But I want it. I want him to know that I want it. That he isn’t a monster to me. He’s something more, something better. My lips part and the taste of pre-cum lands on my tongue before he forces his entire cock into my mouth.
“Well, what do we have here?”
I’m startled by Cas’s voice. I try to pull away from Lorne, but I can’t because his hand is at the back of my head, pushing my nose against his pelvis. The tip of his cock is down my esophagus, and I can’t breathe. He’s going to kill me. I left and people don’t leave men like him. This is his retribution.
“Just showing our sweet little Snow what happens when she’s a bad girl and runs from us.”
From the corner of my eye, I watch Cas. He’s holding a knife. The edge of the blade shimmers and he’s smiling. But it’s not his usual cocky smirk. He looks sinister, like he’s done playing games, and is on a mission.
“Hello, Sunshine. Miss me?”
Chapter 30
Caspian
She’s a deer caught in headlights, and that makes my cock hard as fuck for her.
She stumbles back from Lorne, her eyes never leaving me. I take a step forward and she takes a step back.
Lorne steps to me, his cock still hanging out. “Take it easy, Cas. Don’t spook her.”
I point my blade to his chest. “Spook her? She’s lucky I don’t carve my name on her whole damn chest as punishment. She fucking ran off. We didn’t know where she was, or if she was safe.” I step forward and slide the shiny wrapped present along the pew toward her. “I brought you a gift, Sunshine. Open it.”