“You’re going to need a room,” I tell him.
“Thanks, mate.”
And as he follows me down the hallway, I shove open the door beside mine. If he’s going to be stuck in this place, he might as well be next door to me.
His mother left that day and never came back. She was one of Malcolm’s most esteemed clients, but I would never tell River that. He thinks she’s dead. Murdered by some stranger in the night. I’m still not sure where she is; we haven’t found her yet. Perhaps my father pulled the trigger while he was balls-deep inside her whore cunt.
Tonight, I take out the man who stole our innocence, along with the man who seeded my mother’s womb. Thanos wrenched the purity from River and me, and there was nothing we could do about it. Helpless is something I’ll never be again, not when it comes to the monsters who haunted my childhood nightmares.
A while ago, River asked me what I’d do once the list was complete. I couldn’t answer him because as much as I wanted to tell him I’d move to London and be with him, I knew my heart wasn’t there. Not at the time.
After I’ve completed my mission, maybe I’ll find purpose again. But right now, there’s no way I’ll walk away from what I know I need to do. Keeping Dante, Caia, and River safe is my number-one priority. Second is exacting my revenge and finding my mother. I believed she died long ago, but when Malcolm knew when he took his last breath that I’d find the one last damning secret he’d been keeping all this time — she’s alive somewhere.
Once I find her, perhaps then I’ll be able to let go of the anger I hold close to my chest. Maybe then my life will feel like it matters, because right now, it’s a maelstrom of darkness and destruction.
Memories of my past invade my mind. The father I thought was meant to care for Dante and me only used us as pawns in his game. He created me. His most loyal follower. The son he tormented for years before turning me into a toy for his own sick pleasure.
His love for power, desire for money, and hunger for respect made him a monster. I never thought I’d hate anyone, but as time passed, Malcolm became more engrossed in the darkness. He ensured I would be what he needed.
I think the moment he lost our mother he no longer cared. She was his light, and when the light diminished and went out forever, evil enveloped him.
Sadness grips me for a moment, but I push it down. I hide it from view because the last thing I need is for this asshole to see my weakness. If there’s one good thing I did learn from dear old Dad, it's that you should never let your enemy see your weakness.
It’s the one thing that can get you killed.
CHAPTER SEVEN
DRAKE
The city lights speed by as I put my foot down on the gas pedal. My onyx Audi R8 zips through the near-enough empty streets as I make my way farther out of the city and closer toward the final stage of my plan. Dante has no idea what I lived through, and he doesn’t know why I’m so adamant to complete this list of names. I can’t tell him. Nobody, besides River, can ever know.
I couldn’t tell my brother. The truth would only hurt him. As much as I fought my brother through our years of growing up, I love him and would do anything to ensure his safety. And now, the safety of Caia.
I still think about the one girl who meant something to me for the time she was locked in a cell in the dungeon. She was the first girl I’d thought of keeping for myself, who I wanted to love. But she was broken, so much so that I knew deep down there was no turning back. Sometimes, when you want someone as much as I wanted her, it’s best to walk away. She shattered before me. Her small body bleeding out as I attempted to pray to a god that doesn’t exist. For years I thought she had died. But now, there’s hope. Something I didn’t think I would ever feel again. She isn’t dead; she was just bought like an object.
I don’t know what her state of mind will be when I finally lay my eyes on her again. After being here for so long, I’m certain she’s so broken she doesn’t even remember me. Or she could be working for Thanos and has finally given up on freeing herself, and she’s planning to kill us all for what she’s been through — giving in to the anger and vengeance that most probably fills her heart.