As everyone digs in, I take scoops of everything, but the second the barbecue hits my lips, I know I’ll be going back for seconds. I eat quickly, solely focused on the incredible food, and it’s not until I reach for a second helping of chicken that I realize they’re all staring at me, their mouths agape.
“Sorry,” I mutter, wiping sauce from my chin.
“It’s okay,” Lindsey giggles, a grin taking over her face. “Stress eating. Trust me, we get it.”
The ladies chatter amongst themselves as I finish my second helping. I consider a third, but stop when I notice Burnt walking through the back door. Everyone stops what they’re doing, and turn to look at him.
“Nothing yet,” he advises.
Grace nods. “No news is good news, right?”
“It’s definitely not bad. Spare a plate for V and I?”
“Sure.” Grace heads into the kitchen and returns a few minutes later with a stack of plates in her hands. “Liam’s guys hungry too?”
“They’d have to talk to me to know that,” he mutters.
“Did they hurt you?” I blurt out without thinking. I’d wondered about that since everything went down in Priest’s room, but I’d been too worried about everything else to ask. “My brother, I mean.”
“Nah, sugar. Takes more than a gun to the back of the head to rattle these nerves.” He smacks his chest with his closed fist. “Wasn’t the first time it’s happened, won’t be the last.”
He had a gun to his head. How can he downplay that?
My question must show on my face, because Burnt shakes his head. “Sorry. Humor is how we deal with the hard shit, ya know?”
I didn’t. Finding humor in the dark recesses of my life experiences is not something that’s ever come easy to me. Those moments, like dark voids, ink their way into the few good moments I’ve had.
“Here you go,” Grace says, passing the heaping plates to Burnt.
“Thanks for the grub, ladies. Back to work for me.” He pivots on his heels and heads back out the door.
“Everyone processes things differently,” Blair confides. “Some like Burnt use humor to hide their trauma. Others find another outlet, like working out, or a hobby to distract themselves.” I gaze over at Blair. Her soft, sweet smile is comforting.
“How do you all deal with this stuff? Does it happen all the time?”
“Not as much as you think. But lately, yeah, it’s been bad. The club has been, how do I describe it…?”
“Busy,” Grace interjects. “It’s club life, Bria. The guys here do what others can’t—protect the innocent. Is it always legal? No, but it gets the job done. With the way the world has been these last few years, it’s gotten worse.”
“How do you cope with it? With them being gone?”
“We do our best. We stick together for us, for the kids, and for them. They can go off into the wild blue yonder to take care of business because they know we’ll hold down the fort at home.” Blair’s voice is even, and confident. She’s speaking from experience, it appears. Though, seeing that sleeping baby in her arms, and knowing her husband is out there, going into a dangerous situation with an unknown outcome, terrifies me. This thing between Priest and I is so new. I can’t imagine it would get easier with time.
“We have to be strong for them,” Shelby adds. “This club found my daughter and brought her home safe.”
“They saved me from a stalker,” Blair reveals.
“They gave me a family,” Grace declares.
Cora leans in close to me. “When I first got here, Blair and Lindsey were godsends for me and my son. I spent so much of my life living in fear of his father, I wasn’t really living. TK gave me a safety net. One that can protect us all while we heal. That includes you, you know.”
Blair reaches over and grabs Cora’s hand, giving it a squeeze.
“They’re our home. Sure, they have their faults. Temperamental moody bastards most of the time.” The ladies laugh at that. “But they’re ours, and we’re theirs. It all works because we’re strong for each other. We can be that for you too, if you’d let us.”
Tears threaten to take over, and I swallow, fighting to hold them back. “I don’t know where I fit into all of this,” I admit. “There’s so much I don’t understand.”
Blair nods. “And that’s totally okay. The trauma you’ve been subjected to isn’t just going to go away. It takes time, and finding someone you trust enough to help you work through it isn’t easy, but I think you’ve found that in Priest.”