Blinking back tears that are threatening to fall, I will myself to be strong. I remember that night so vividly. The smell of blood, the shocked look on the fucker’s face as I plunged the blade into his chest over and over and over again. The handle of the knife had been so slick with blood my hand slipped and I cut my fingers. That only added fuel to the rage in me, the thought that his blood mingled with mine…triggered something primal in me. Something ugly. Something I couldn’t stop.
When the blade snapped, I remembered grabbing the closest thing at hand, a heavy glass ashtray off the coffee table and continuing to hit him. The ashtray made a different sound, a thudding instead of the squelching, wet sound the knife made. No matter what he’d done to me, or how much I had been hurt, the second he wanted to go after Jake…I couldn’t hold back. Iwouldn’thold back.
Court had been a nightmare. I’d pled self-defence, but the overkill had worked against me. The only thing that saved my life was the fact that the knife had already been in my hand; I’d picked up an object at hand, and he’d tried to move after the knife broke.
Something in me snapped, and the jury ate that up. They swallowed my story of being sexually abused. I was a poor, defenceless little foster girl at the mercy of a man who wished me harm. Except…it wasn’t a story. Every bit of it was my true, living nightmare. The man was a monster who ruined my life. My only regret about that day was that he’d died too quickly. I wished I’d had the self-control to kill him slowly. I wanted him to suffer, just like he had made me suffer every single night that he crept into my room to rape me.
Jake sighs, but he doesn't keep arguing with me, so I count that as a win. He looks away. I grin and lightly pinch his cheek, trying desperately to lighten the mood.
“Come on, let's get some room service,” I suggest with a cheeky smile. “Sam won't be back, which means you can stay here with me and make me feel safe.”
At that, Jake's eyes soften, and he nods. His fingers curl around me and pull me into a hug as he buries his face in my hair. “I'll always make sure you're safe, Clo.”
I grin and leave him so that I can fix the bed, shower, and then change into more appropriate attire while Jake orders whatever he wants to eat. This isn't going on my card, after all. Sam seems like the kind of guy who would be willing to pay any bill to keep me quiet, and well, hedidoffer to put me up and take care of me, didn't he?
Room service arrives just as I come out of the shower. No sooner than we finish eating, Jake’s asleep, practically curled up on himself on the cleaner side of the bed. He's clearly exhausted, the poor thing. He’s probably been worrying about me. I stay up, picking at my leftovers as I watch his chest rise and fall, his face slack with unconsciousness. Even in sleep, there's a small furrow between his brows and dark circles under his eyes, denoting many restless nights.
He looks so grown up, even though on the inside, to me, he's still just the same fragile kid, determined to protect his little sister. He's all I have left, and I know there isn't a thing in the world that I wouldn't do for him. If that means making a deal with the devil.
I force myself to stop watching Jake sleep like a creep and shift my thoughts to Sam. My lips twitch at the corners, a sense of satisfaction washing over me. This whole thing feels almost too easy, and honestly, I'm kind of looking forward to messing with him a little more in the future. Fooling him into sleeping with me was easy. Any guilt I had over what I was doing evaporated the moment he broke his hands free and sunk himself deeper inside me.
In some strange way, taking control of Sam and ruining his life like this, hurting him like this, it's just taking revenge against every single guy who has taken advantage of me in the past. He's no better than the rest of them, and this time I get to be the agent of his demise.
He deserves everything that's coming, and I can't wait to give it to him.
CHAPTER11
SAM
What the heck happened back there?
I close my eyes and try to remember, but I can’t navigate through the hazy mess that’s fogging my mind. I have no fucking clue how I ended up on that bed with her on top of me. The last thing I remember is getting up to leave, and then I blacked out. Then, out of nowhere, it hits me. The glass of Coke.
Shedruggedme.
But why? What did she have to gain by drugging me and sleeping with me? Was there something she needed that she wasn’t getting? If she wanted sex so badly, I don’t doubt Lucas would have obliged. Though that thought makes my blood boil. The point is that she’s not the type of person who needs to drug guys to get them to fuck her, so why me?
As angry and confused as I am, I can’t deny that I’m at fault too. Nothing excuses what happened back there. I managed to get my hands free, and instead of pushing her away, I grabbed her ass and shoved deeper into her, as far as I could go. The stunned, excited look on her face when I filled her up haunts my thoughts even now.
I rub my forehead, the killer headache that is beginning to form behind my skull almost a punishment for my crime. I’m in a position I swore I’d never let myself get into. It’s not like I can report what happened because my body wanted it as much as she did. On some disturbed level, I think I feelreliefthat it happened the way it did, which is all kinds of fucked up.
Eventually, I would have messed up and crossed that line, and once I did, there would’ve been no going back. At least this way I can feel better about myself.
No.
What happened was wrong on so many levels. There’s something seriously wrong with her. And for me to sit here and justify it all like that, there must be something wrong withme.
* * *
A few hours later,the effect of the drug is beginning to wear off. It’s in the early hours of Saturday morning and the house is too quiet, so I get out of bed and pour myself a drink to block out the silence. I sink down onto the couch and contemplate my life. The only person I really care about is my daughter. Bile rises in my throat as I think about her, but I force it back down. This whole thing with Chloe terrifies me because what if it comes out that I slept with a student? I could kiss any chance I had of getting custody of my daughter goodbye because I’d be in jail.
Finishing the drink in my hand, I quickly pour another. As I take a huge gulp, my phone rings again. This time Isaac’s name pops up and I stare at the illuminated screen. What’s he doing calling me at this time of the night? Without hesitating, I reach out and touch the red ignore button. I can’t face talking to anyone right now.
All I want to do is drink and forget I ever met Chloe.
* * *
Acid burnsmy lungs as I force myself to sit up, the light shining in through the open curtains stinging my eyes. I blink a few times while my mind tries to process what the hell is happening. I check my phone and see it’s just past seven a.m. Monday morning. Where did the weekend go?