“Alright,” she finally answered and let me lead her to the dance floor.
Wrapping my arm around her waist, I pulled her flush against me, not wanting any distance between us. I wished I could tell her the truth, but the less any of them knew, the better. I just wanted to get everything taken care of and move the fuck on with my life. Putting Maddie on their radar made me sick to my stomach. I’d do whatever it took to keep her safe, even if it meant having to walk away for good.
“You okay, Hulk?” Maddie asked me. “You’re not blinking.”
I hadn’t realized I was staring so intently until she spoke. “Yeah, Mads. I’m fine.” Though I smiled at her, she narrowed her eyes as if she could see right through my bullshit. She stepped closer until her head rested on my shoulder, and I inhaled the scent of her sweet shampoo. Maddie was always stunning, but today, she looked flawless in her bridesmaid gown with her dark hair pulled up. I had a perfect view of her neck, and my mind ran wild with images of kissing her soft skin.
Thinking back to that night, I let my guard down around Maddie, and I know she wants more from me, but I can’t. After my parents’ turbulent divorce and the pain on my father’s face after learning about my mother’s affair, I can’t even take love seriously. To the outside world, they had the picture-perfect marriage, but behind closed doors, they were two strangers simply sharing a bed. Being that close to the betrayal and lies made me never want to be in that situation or allow myself to get close enough to get hurt. If it could happen to my father, who loved my mother more than life itself, then it could happen to me too. I refuse to make myself vulnerable to that. Maddie isn’t like any girl I’ve ever encountered with her sweet personality and sassy mouth. While she’s feisty as fuck, she’s also determined to work hard to make her dreams come true. There’s something so goddamn special about her, and I can’t ruin our friendship by sleeping with her. She’s been more than willing to give her virginity to me, but I just can’t. It’s a risk I’m not willing to take. I’ve never been in a serious relationship, and I’d inevitably fuck it up. I’d question everything, their trust and loyalty, but also my own ability to be enough. Even if I were interested in dating someone long-term, my job and frequent traveling would prevent me from having stability.
Before I even get back to California, JJ sends me instructions to meet him in Vegas so we can discuss my repayment. As soon as I’m home, I pack clean clothes and take a shower before I pass out. I’m fucking exhausted, but I have no choice. To explain my unexpected departure, I tell my roommates I got a lead on a fugitive I’ve been tracking and need to leave before I lose him again. Mason buys it, considering this is what I do, but I can tell Sophie and Maddie have their suspicions.
The next morning, I leave early and arrive in Vegas. As I walk through the airport, my mind spins out of control, but I try to remain calm. I nearly drank myself stupid last night, hoping to numb the anxiety of what I’d be walking into. Today’s judgment day and time to figure this shit out. Put it behind me and make sure Maddie’s out of their grasp.
I take my carry-on and schedule an Uber then head to my friend Tyler’s house. I met him through Mason a couple years ago when Tyler was his boxing trainer before he moved. Now he helps me anytime I’m in Vegas for a job since I’m not comfortable checking my gun and don’t want to risk having it traced back to me in case anything happens.
“You want backup?” he asks after I strap on a bulletproof vest and holster my weapon. I slide on a leather jacket to keep everything hidden.
Knowing I can trust Tyler, I decide to tell him the truth. “I’m not here for a job,” I say.
He eyes me over his beer bottle as he takes a sip. “Really? Care to explain?”
I give him the washed-down version, explaining the gambling, meeting JJ, and losing the money that apparently wasn’t his to loan. After I say it aloud, I realize how fucking insane this really is.
“Yeah, so maybe you should come with me. Stay in the lobby, and I can text you if I need help.”
“Dude, I can’t believe you got messed up with the O’Leary family.” He shakes his head as we walk out to his truck.
“Trust me, I wouldn’t have if I had known. JJ propositioned me, and by the time I found out, it was too damn late. The damage was done, the money lost, and my life fucked up.”