“Smile, Ash,” I said, pulling up my phone to take the pictures. “Pinkies out.”
He laughed a real laugh and held his pinkie out as he lifted his chocolate martini next to Marley’s. My heart fluttered at that sight. Derek and I exchanged a look. This was the closest I’d seen to the Ash we both knew and loved in a long time. Maybe he was finally coming out of it.
“There.” I showed them the picture. “It’s perfect.”
Marley giggled and then took a long sip of her drink. She was also pretty wasted. Derek and I had stopped drinking a while ago. He wanted to make sure there was someone to take Marley and Ash home. I just didn’t want to be that drunk around Ash. When my inhibitions were low, I knew where my heart lay. Even if, logically, I didn’t want anything with Ash anymore, that didn’t mean I actually didn’t want anything with him anymore.
“We’re adorable,” Marley confirmed.
Ash snorted. “These are actually incredible.”
“Told you!” Marley said, clinking her drink against his again.
I dug into the chocolate cheesecake while Marley and Derek ate the chocolate suspension cake, which was two layers of chocolate cake with a middle layer of strawberries and cream. All of it was incredible.
When we finished, Derek put an arm around a drunk Marley and helped her out of the restaurant. Something was definitely happening there.
“You ready to go?” I asked Ash. “I’ll walk with you.”
His eyes traveled down my body and back up. I flushed at that look.
“Sure,” he said.
“I’ll get an Uber,” Marley said, retrieving her phone and then promptly dropping it. She was wasted.
Derek picked up her phone and kept her upright. He shot me a look.
“I’ll drive you,” Derek told Marley.
I nodded. “Good idea. I’m going to walk Ash. It’s not far.”
“No way,” Derek said instantly, looking at his drunk friend. “I’ll drop you off too.”
“I’m a hundred percent fine.” I did a twirl to prove it to him. “I’ll catch an Uber from his place.”
“Text me when you’re home.”
I laughed. “Will do, Dad.”
Derek shot Ash another alarmed look before relenting. He clearly wanted to get Marley home more than he wanted to watch whether or not Ash was going to do something stupid.
“Come on. Your place isn’t far.”
Ash slung an arm around my waist, and we walked through City Market. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too. Even if UNC did lose.”
Ash laughed. “Best part of my day.”
I rolled my eyes at him. The Duke-UNC rivalry was legendary, and my entire family had gone to UNC. My mom and dad had met there. Derek had played basketball there. I had been born and raised a UNC fan while Ash had gone to Duke, just like his father before him. Even though it wasn’t my alma mater, we still had the rivalry going. And UNC had had a devastating defeat in football earlier that evening. Which made Ash’s birthday.
We chatted the rest of the way to Ash’s house. I was glad that he lived so close to town. Though I could see how that was a problem for his drinking. It was probably why he knew all the bouncers and bartenders at every place we’d gone to tonight. If I hadn’t seen a glimpse of the real Ash come out tonight, I would have been more worried.
This much drinking wasn’t good under any circumstances. I had no idea how he was surviving at his job right now. I wanted to say something, but not on his birthday.
“Hey, Mia,” he said as we reached the front door. “You should come in.”
“I will help you inside.”
He grinned devilishly as he took my hand and pulled me up the sidewalk to the front door. I shook my head at that look. He was literally drunk as shit and still flirting with me.
Ash fumbled with the key. Finally, I took it out of his hand and opened the door for him. He threw it wide and tugged me toward the entrance. I held my ground.
“Actually, I’m going to call an Uber and head home.”
Ash gave me a charming look. “No. Come on. Just stay.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not?” he asked, reaching for me again. He slipped an arm around my waist and pushed me against the doorframe.
“Ash,” I whispered, my heart racing ahead of me. I didn’t want this. Not like this. Not ever again. “You need to stop. You’re drunk.”
“Mia …” He brushed my hair out of the way and smiled down at me. “I’m not that drunk.”
I laughed and removed his hands from me. “You are. And I should head home.”
He grabbed my hand before I could walk away. “Please stay. Come inside and have a drink with me.”
“I can’t,” I said, my voice finally wavering.
If Ash had been asking this while sober, if things had been different, I didn’t know if I would have been able to turn him down over and over again. Because even though this wasn’t happening between us, it didn’t mean that I didn’t want it to. I just wanted him to be past all of this. I wanted him to be past Lila. But he wasn’t, and until he was, it wasn’t fair to me.