Yes. Fuck, yes.On her knees without a stitch of clothes on, those pretty lips asking for all the salacious things he wanted to show her, his fingers tight in her hair.
But no. That he couldn’t have. But this? Just a little taste. Maybe this.
He slid his palms along her arms and gripped her wrists, stilling her hands against his collarbone and feeling her pulse beating against his fingertips. He held the eye contact, trying to come up with the right words to say. But the open want on her face was too damn much. He lowered his head and did what he’d been wanting to do all night. He kissed her.
She seemed to melt the instant their lips touched, like he’d offered her the greatest relief, and he held her wrists tight. Her lips parted, and he dove into the kiss, his tongue tangling with hers, a groan escaping him. She stayed where he held her, letting him control the pace of the kiss, and that only made it hotter. He wanted to find a dark corner and shove her dress up, slide his hand between her thighs and rip that fucking thong off, tuck his fingers inside her and feel just how badly she ached to have him there.
But before his baser instincts could fully take over, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He startled, pulling away from O’Neal, and turned his head.
“Sorry to interrupt, kids, but they’re kicking us out,” Lennox said, cocking his thumb toward the bar, expression inscrutable. “Y’all are the last ones left on the dance floor.”
O’Neal blinked and looked around, surprise registering on her face at the sight of the empty club. “Where’s Quyen?”
“She caught a ride with a girl from one of her classes a while ago,” Len said. “The friend was sober. I told her we’d make sure you got home all right. After a lengthy interrogation, she agreed to let us give you a ride.”
“Oh,” O’Neal said, still looking a little dazed.
“Ready to head back to the dorms?” Lennox asked.
“Um.” O’Neal looked to Auden, questions in her eyes.
“Or…not?” Len glanced between the two of them, eyebrows up.
“Not,” Auden said, keeping his focus on O’Neal, the decision smoothing something jagged inside him. He put his hand out to her. “She’s coming home with me.”
Some combination of relief and trepidation crossed over her features, but then she smiled and put her hand in his. “I’m coming home with you.”
Lennox sent Auden a look over O’Neal’s shoulder, and a slow smile crept up his friend’s lips. “Okay then. Let’s get out of here.”
CHAPTERTEN
O’Neal knew she should be freaking out as she sat in the front seat next to Auden on the way to his apartment. She was supposed to be nervous. And somewhere in her psyche, she probably was. But as soon as Auden had put out his hand and asked her to come home with him, a deep level of calm had moved through her.
If she could pick any person in the world to walk her through this experience, it would be him. She’d known for a while that she didn’t want to wait until she was married for sex. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever want to get married at all. But there was so much she didn’t know that the thought of trying something with someone was too overwhelming and intimidating to fathom—to even fantasize about. Except with Auden. She’d long been able to imagine it with Auden. He wouldn’t let this be scary or bad for her. If she had questions, he’d answer them. If she did something wrong, he’d show her the right way without making her feel bad about it. She trusted that with one hundred percent certainty. She trustedhim.
And no, this wasn’t the conventional way to go about things. They weren’t going to date. He wasn’t going to be her boyfriend. She knew that. He was going to be her…teacher. But she imagined she could do a lot worse when it came to first times. Plus, something about the thought of having Auden be in charge of things made her skin tingle. She knew how to be a student. It was what she’d always been best at.
So, in her gut, she knew this was the right choice. She had yet to regret him being her first kiss. Auden was gorgeous and funny and kind. He made her hot all over, but she also felt safe with him. She’d rather experience first-time things with her trusted friend than to roll the dice with some guy she met randomly.
If she’d gone home with Connall tonight, she’d be in a full-blown panic by now. She’d be afraid of embarrassing herself or feeling awkward or making a mistake. Or worse…putting herself in a dangerous situation. She hadn’t gotten a bad vibe from Connall, but she also didn’tknowhim yet. Her mom had gone somewhere with some guy and had never made it home. She needed more experience and tools in her arsenal before she could tackle those situations with guys who actually could be potential dates or boyfriends.
With Auden, she could take those unknown factors out of play. SheknewAuden. Had grown up with him, had seen him be goofy and weird and sexy and smart, had seen him be good to his sister, sweet to his parents. He was a straight-up nice guy.
One who was about to relieve her of her virginity.
A ping went through her at that, some weird combination of anticipation and anxiety. A roller coaster climb.
She must’ve made some sound of distress because Auden glanced over at her, the glare from the streetlights flashing across his face. “You okay? You’re pretty quiet over there.”
She forced a tight smile and nodded. “Uh-huh.”
“Least convincing uh-huh ever,” Lennox said from the backseat. “The silence is killing me, you guys. You two decide to hook up, and suddenly everyone has forgotten how to talk.”
“Len,” Auden warned, sending a glance to the rearview mirror.
“No, it’s okay,” O’Neal said, turning to look at Lennox. “You’re right. We’re making this awkward. Sorry.”
“And we’re nothooking up,” Auden clarified. “Don’t make it sound like that.”