“Have you told her anything about me?” she blurted out. “About my abilities?”
“Of course not. You know I’d never expose you or Grace to an outsider. No one in the family would. I hope you’re not worried about that.”
She shook her head. “You don’t understand. I needed to know if she already knew because if she didn’t, I don’t want you to say anything to her because . . .”
She broke off and looked down, an unhappy frown marring her delicate features.
“Because why, baby?” Nathan asked, sitting forward so he could look back at her. He was about to fidget right off the couch, and Joe knew that his twin’s patience was waning. When it came to anything that upset Shea, Nathan would tear down the damn house to get answers so he could fix the problem.
She sighed, her expression dimming, her eyes looking more and more unhappy. “I connected to her at the cookout,” she whispered. “Or at least I think it was her. It had to be, right? I mean, I’ve never been able to connect to anyone else in the family except the two of you, and she was the only one there I hadn’t been around before.”
Joe and Nathan exchanged sharp glances and Joe sucked in his breath.
“What did you see, honey?” Joe asked, trying to keep the sudden surge of anxiety from his voice.
His pulse had immediately quickened and sweat formed on his brow. He realized he was . . . scared. Scared of what Shea might tell him but at the same time, if she had seen into Zoe’s thoughts, then she’d be able to tell him what he wanted to know. Most importantly, she’d be able to tell him what the hell Zoe was so scared of.
“I didn’t see anything,” she said, her shoulders sagging.
Nathan pulled her into his arms, his gaze full of worry and concern for his wife. “How bad was it? And why didn’t you tell me when it happened? Damn it, Shea. You should have told me the minute it happened so I could get you the hell out of there.”
He could understand Nathan’s point. It was never easy for Shea to connect to another person. It was an enormously draining experience, one that sapped her strength and left her extremely vulnerable. Not to mention the pain it caused her if she attempted to help the other person in any way.
“But I felt . . .” She broke off, and her eyes were troubled as she looked up at Joe. “I felt her fear, Joe. It was overwhelming and so suffocating I thought I was going to pass out.”
Nathan’s grip tightened around his wife and his expression was a mixture of fear, anger and worry.
“I didn’t want to intrude or invade her privacy,” she said quickly. “I hope you know that, Joe. I would never do that to family or someone who was a guest of the family.”
Joe reached out to touch her cheek. “Shhh, honey. I know that. We all know that. You’ve said it yourself. You can’t help who you connect to. It’s random and beyond your control. But why were you so worried that I had said something to Zoe about your abilities if you didn’t see into her mind?”
Shea reached for Joe’s hand, holding it so tightly that her small nails dug painfully into his skin. He doubted she even realized the urgency that was radiating from her. He and Nathan could both feel her agitation. It was the first time in a long while the mental pathway between him and Shea had been open. He doubted she was cognizant of that either, and it bothered him that her experience with Zoe had messed with her so badly that she didn’t even realize she was broadcasting loud and clear to both the brothers. Nathan was understandable. The pathway was always open between the two of them, and as a result, Nathan always knew if Shea was in any sort of pain or distress, if she was afraid or in trouble. But that was not the case with Joe.
Except . . .
“Wait a second,” Joe said, glancing quickly at his brother to see if he’d already picked up on what he had. Judging by the tightness of his expression, he had. Or he was getting there at least.
Shea glanced up at Joe in question.
“Why didn’t Nathan know when this was happening?” he asked.
“That’s a damn good question,” Nathan growled.
Color rose in Shea’s cheeks and she dropped her eyes so she wasn’t looking at either brother.
“Shea?” Nathan prompted. “Baby, why would you hide that from me? I don’t like the idea of you experiencing something like that, when that was the last place you expected something like that to come at you, and especially when you just said you felt like you were suffocating and were worried about passing out. Why would you close yourself off to me like that?”
An edge of hurt tinged his brother’s voice and Joe’s chest tightened in response. No one but Joe and Shea knew the battle that Nathan still fought with his demons. That there were still nights he didn’t sleep and nights when he did that were haunted by nightmares. One of the biggest nightmares being that of losing Shea. It was why he needed her near at all times, even when they were physically separated. The telepathic connection they shared meant she was in his head at all times just as he was in hers. It kept Nathan grounded and secure, as he needed to know at all times that the woman he loved more than life was safe, especially when he was on a mission and was away from her for an indefinite period of time.
The fact that she had closed herself off from him would feel like a rejection to Nathan, and Joe worried what that would do to the battle that still raged within him. And what it would do to his brother and sister-in-law’s relationship. God help them all if Nathan ever lost Shea. He wouldn’t survive it. What a bunch of fucking terrorist bastards hadn’t managed to do to his brother, break him, prevent him from coming home, end his life . . . would be accomplished if he had to ever live without Shea.