She worked diligently to skin and clean the animals as Black Feather joined her. She knew how to skin a rabbit, but Black Feather had taught her to skin the deer. She also knew how to pluck the feathers from the turkey. She was good with the turkey as she had plucked many turkeys in her life. Yet she was much slower than Black Feather.
When Lone Wolf moved off to talk with Deer Runner he glanced at her several times as he talked. She didn't know what they were talking about. But she assumed she had done something to displease him as his face was serious through supper and as her and Black Feather cleaned the dishes, she watched him from the corner of her eyes.
"I think he's upset with me." Hannah told Black Feather.
"Why?"
"I touched his arm and his smile faded. I assumed too much. I must be careful and remember my place, for I am but a slave to him."
"I do not think that is what troubles him." Black Feather scoffed.
"What else is there? It is only when I respond to a kiss or presume to touch him that he turns away."
"Lone Wolf considers you his responsibility. He also knows you are married. He fights the same battle you do inside his heart. Your white husband, whether you loved him or not, comes between you."
"Maybe he thinks I'm to brazen by kissing him back."
"And maybe he realizes that the
change in you, makes a change in him too. When people marry they become one. He has never loved before either, Hannah."
Hannah stared at her, "I am not one with Liam. I am Lone Wolf's slave, and men do not love their slaves, do they?"
"It is difficult to say, but you are not married in your heart to Liam."
Hannah considered her words. "Liam told his friends I was a bad lover. I fear I cannot please any man. It frightens me."
Black Feather smiled sympathetically with her, "You never gave your heart away, until now. It does not mean you’re a bad lover, it means your heart was never with your white husband. You did not marry him, he married you. And when you return Lone Wolf's kisses, are they like the kisses of your husband?"
"No… they are not." Hannah turned to look straight at Black Feather, "I am his slave Black Feather, and it is I who messes things up. I get confused in my heart. I feel things I shouldn't. Perhaps I am a hussy."
"There is so much for you to learn about life and love, Hannah. You did not love your husband, so you did not respond to his kisses or love making. But you tell me it is different with Lone Wolf. Don't you see, you are falling in love with him?" Hannah stared at Lone Wolf and now he looked upon her with a slight smile.
"I cannot justify not giving my heart to Liam, nor this rush of a feeling when I look at Lone Wolf. It isn't right, but I cannot stop it. His kiss stirs something inside me. His smile makes my heart leap. I want him to wrap his arms around me, so I can sleep in peace. I feel so safe with him."
Black Feather put a hand on her arm now, "It is not wrong to feel this rush for Lone Wolf, for he has captured your heart, for the first time."
"Is it not sinful?" Hannah asked.
"Depends, if you look upon Lone Wolf with lust in your heart, or love. You must decide this for yourself."
"How will I know for sure what I'm feeling? As it is all new to me."
"You will know, when the time is right."
"I hope you are right. And I hope I am not presuming too much. I do not want to shame him."
"Remember this, once you give your heart away to a man, you cannot have it back. It is his."
She smiled and walked away. Hannah thought about that.
That evening as they lay down, she curled herself close to him but turned her back to him. Strangely he fell asleep before she did. And the gentle soft sounds of his sleep comforted her. She snuggled closer and smiled as she drifted off. His arms held her against him.
When she awoke the next morning, early, his hand was on top of her breast. She held her breath for a moment, but he quickly moved to get up.
Red faced she scrambled to her feet also.
"Good morning," he turned to look at her.