I sit on the edge of the bed, resting my elbows on my knees. I run my hands over my face. Sleep. I’m just tired. What I need is a good night’s sleep, and everything will look the same in the morning.
“You okay?” Alyssa asks. Her small hand runs over the top of my head, her fingers gliding through my hair.
“I’m fine. Just tired. It’s been a long day.”
She nods. “That it has. The bathroom is all yours.”
“Thanks, Tink.” I stand and press my lips to the top of her head before grabbing my own clothes to change into. When I open the bathroom door not long after, the room is lit with a soft glow from the bedside lamp.
“I can’t believe how big this bed is. It feels much larger than a king. Maybe because it sits up so high?” she asks as I make my way to the bed and slide beneath the covers.
“It’s not high, Tink. You’re just short.”
“Hey!” Her laughter fills the space between us. “I’m built low for stability.” She rolls over and turns off the lamp before settling back into her spot. “On another note, the girls and I had a chance to talk to Jordyn a little today. She’s nice.”
“She is. And I give her props for putting up with my little brother.”
“Stop.” I can hear the laughter in her voice. “It’s not just Ryder. All the ladies need medals for putting up with a Kincaid man. Even me. I mean, I’m just the best friend, but I should still qualify.”
I want to tell her she’s not “just” anything, but I keep my mouth tightly closed. My head is all over the place. I don’t know what’s happening to me. My thoughts immediately go to that she’s more. She’s family. Any other time I’d be quick to tell her that, but my head is such a jumbled mess, I don’t this time.
“You qualify, Tink.”
“Anyway, she seems nice, but I’m worried she might break his heart. I know that her being here means she’s important to him, and she’s up for an internship for fashion in Paris. Paris, Sterling!”
“Good for her. I’m sure Ryder knows, and I’m sure if he cares about her, it won’t matter.”
“Just like that?” she asks.
“Just like what?”
“It’s that easy? He cares about her, so you accept that he’s going to be fine?”
“Love harder,” I remind her.
“I know… but, Tank, she could be leaving.”
“They’re figuring it out.”
“What if he goes with her?”
“That would suck. I’d miss him, but Ryder knows what’s best for him.”
“I can’t believe you’re being so chill about this.”
“Must be my lack of sleep.” And the fact that her friends, my sisters-in-law, planted a seed and made my head a mess of feelings, questions, and what-ifs.
She yawns. “Me too. Night, Tank.”
I feel the bed shift as she moves over and places a kiss on my cheek. There’s a small filter of light from the full moon that allows me to make out her form but not her features. Not that I need to see to know every curve and line of her.
I return the sentiment, kissing her cheek. “Night, Tink.” I fall back to my side of the bed and close my eyes, willing sleep to claim me.
I don’t know how much time has passed, but Alyssa has been asleep for quite a while. She rolls over and seeks me out. She wraps her arms and legs around me and sighs with contentment.
Unable to resist, I wrap my arm around her. Hold her. I’ve held her before, lots of times, but this is the first time I’ve realized this is what I need.
Sheis what I need.