ChapterTen
Siobhan
Friends with benefits—orwas it fuck buddies? It’s all the same, isn’t it?
I agreed to have grown-up sleepovers with a stranger where there’ll be a lot of sex and lavish dates.
Is this smart? Probably not.
He’s giving me exactly what I need. Nights with a man who knows his way around the female body but doesn’t want any entanglements with my bruised heart.
For a woman who doesn’t adapt well and prefers to plan everything that’s happening in her life, I’m taking a lot of risks.
It’s so unlike me to agree to have an affair. That is what we’re having, right?
I mean, people usually apply that word to extramarital relationships, but it can also be a passionate romance with a limited duration. There has to be a reason why Nydia hates him.
I wish she would trust me. We’re best friends, but sometimes I feel like she hides so much from me. And maybe that’s what this town is for. It buries our past and our emotional baggage and gives us a chance to reinvent ourselves.
Siobhan from Chicago wouldn’t dare give a man like Iskander a second glance. He’s too handsome, too wealthy, and too smooth. Guys like him don’t notice women like me. Then again, he doesn’t know anything about my past.
Stop finding a reason not to be with him, Siobhan.It’s just a few months. Once his grandfather is better, he’ll leave. Maybe at some point during those months, I should search for a new job. I can only hide from the world for so long. I could go back to Chicago—or any other city where I can jump back into the corporate world.
That’s what I want, isn’t it?
I worked hard to become Siobhan Walters. Headhunters have called me, offering me hefty salaries and big benefits. And I let go of everything for a man.
I send a message to Anya. It’s been almost a month since the last time I checked on her—or she messaged me. Mom would be disappointed in me. It’s hard to keep track of all her foster children. In fact, Anya is the only one I’ve kept in touch with since Mom died. I guess it’s because we always clicked. The moment I met her, we became inseparable.
Siobhan: How’s it going?
Anya: Same as usual. Work keeps me busy. There’s no baby. Mitchell is still an extraordinary husband.
Anya: Are you ready to come back home?
I stare at the text, not sure how to respond. Mitchell is a wonderful man, and sometimes I envy those two. He’s one of the few foster children who stayed in touch with Mom. Lucky for him, that’s how he met Anya. I’m glad she has someone who loves her unconditionally and gives her everything she deserves. He’s a good, hardworking guy who wasn’t too lucky while growing up but has been able to build a business and find the love of his life.
Maybe I should focus on him because I can’t find the right words to tell her I’m sorry she’s not pregnant. Is there anything I can say that’ll make her feel better? If I could, I’d fly to her, hug her, and just be there for her. It’s almost impossible. And that takes me to the big question: Am I ready to go home?
It’s a one-word answer. No. Unfortunately, she won’t be satisfied with my answer. Anya always wants to know more. If I tell her about Iskander, she’ll call him the rebound guy, and she won’t believe I’m not falling for him. Anya might pressure me to go back to Chicago.
The only thing waiting for me are bad memories. Memories of Mom, Roland, and the dreams I can never have.
Siobhan: You do have an amazing husband. He better keep being that way, or… well, I’ll figure out a way to make him pay.
Suddenly, Mitch sends me a text.
Mitchell: I’ll always look out for her. Now leave my wife alone. We’re trying to make a baby.
They are what I want to have someday. Maybe once I’m back in Chicago. I just need to keep my head straight and my heart safe. Every time Iskander and I have sex, I wonder if he’s the love of my life. I even swear we’re soulmates.
We’re not.
We’re just two people who conveniently found each other when they needed to blow off some steam.
ChapterEleven
Siobhan