“It was a great class. See you tomorrow. Oh! And thanks for all the help.” And then I all but run out of the office.
I don’t stop until I reach the bus stop that will take me to the train station. What in the heck was that? I don’t react like that to guys, much less to my professors. My body is still warm, and my nipples press against my bra. Thank god I had a jacket on. Otherwise, Henri would have been able to tell how aroused I was. My eyes shut. I need to get it together. I have a boyfriend for crying out loud. Crap! I pull out my phone and cringe at the amount of text messages there are. There’s twenty, and each one gets angrier and angrier. The last one pisses me off.
Kyle: When you’re done slobbing his knob, call me. I want my jacket back.
I call him, waiting for him to answer. When he doesn’t, I leave him a voicemail.
“First, how dare you imply that I would give our professor a blow job. Second, I invited you to come with me to his office. Third, you’re being an asshole. Don’t call me until you’re ready to apologize.”
I end the call only to find a woman near me clapping.
“You tell him, girl!”
I give her a weak smile and drop my phone into my bag. Seriously, what is Kyle’s deal? I’m still stewing over his comments when I pick up the kids and take them home. Chip rambles on about what he learned at school while I make dinner.
Everything is going great until my father storms in, knocking over a chair. I can tell by the look in his eye that he’s in a mean mood.
“Chip, take your homework to our room, please.”
Chip glances between my father and me, but does as I’ve asked. I’m so thankful Belle is in her crib. One less thing to worry about. Even from here, I can smell the alcohol on my father.
“Dinner is almost ready.”
“I don’t give a shit about dinner.”
He moves, so he has me blocked between his body and the stove. Heat from the flames lick at my back, but I don’t dare move an inch.
“I’m so sick and tired of working my ass off all day and coming home to this fucking mess.” His rancid breath makes my stomach turn. “If you can’t do your job, then maybe you should get your shit and leave.”
“Dad, you’ve had a long day. I can bring you a plate if you want to sit in your chair.”
He backhands me so hard that my head whips to the side.
“I don’t need a little cunt to tell me what to do. In fact, I could teach you a thing or two.”
I flinch, and that’s where everything goes wrong. I should know better by now. He thrives on knowing he scares me. That he can hurt me. I try to dart from the kitchen, but he knocks me to the floor as his fists hit me from every angle. I pray that Chip doesn’t come out. My father hasn’t hit him yet, but each day I know we get closer to that line being crossed.
“You stupid cunt. You’re no good to me. I ought to get rid of you. Sell you to the highest bidder.”
A kick lands on my side, and I cry out.
“I bet you’d go for at least a grand. Maybe that’s what I’ll do. Sell you so I don’t have to see your face ever again.”
He always says unhinged things when he gets like this, but this is the first time he’s said he wants to sell me. Every fiber in my body screams that this is different. He’s thought about it. Why else would he say it? Before I can dwell on it too much, he kicks me in the side of the head, and everything goes dark.
Too bad I just don’t know how to die.
3
Dove
I wake up alone and on the floor. The food on the stove is burned, and I hear Belle crying. Shoving myself off the floor, I bite back a whimper of pain as I turn off the gas on the stove. There’s a dark voice deep inside of my head that taunts me, telling me I should turn it back on, but make sure the flame is off. Once the apartment fills with gas, we’ll all just go to sleep, and this will be over. But I can’t do that.
Iwon’t.
Everything hurts, and I don’t want to scare Chip when I go back to our room. I don’t need a mirror to know I look like shit. Shoving my pain aside, I make two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and pour a glass of milk for Chip. Quietly, I make Belle a bottle and bring the powdered formula with me. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve used the water in the bathroom to make a bottle just to avoid my father.
Gathering everything on a tray, I make my way to my room, slipping silently into the room. Belle is in her crib, crying. Chip is nowhere to be found. For a moment, I panic. Did my father get him? Is he hurt?