Oh my God, what’s happening.
What do I…
How is it that Reign is out there, going through all the crap right now, and I’m standing here, half-clothed, answering my ex-boyfriend’s ridiculous questions about rape?
“I wanted it, okay?” I tell him, my whole body both blushing and shaking. “I wanted it. Can you please let me go now? I need to go now. I need to —”
“He was at The Horny Bard.”
“What?”
“Last night. He was at the bar, Echo,” Lucas informs me. “He was out there trolling for chicks.”
“No, he wasn’t. He went there with hisbrother. He…” I look up to the ceiling. “Oh my God, why are we talking about this? Why are we —”
“I knew he’d do this.”
“Do what?” I clench my teeth. “Do fuckingwhat, Lucas? He didn’t do anything.”
“I knew it from the beginning. I knew he’d ruin you. I knew he’d be bad for you. I’ve been friends with him since we were kids. I’ve seen him go through girls just like that and when you showed up, he went all crazy over you. I could see that. I could fucking see how much he wanted you. But I guess he had some decency left in him that he let you go and didn’t make a move on you. And thank fucking God because it would’ve been easy for him to. Because you were so completely under his spell. You werecompletelyinfatuated with him, Echo.”
“What?”
“I could see that,” he says. “You’d look for him at school. You’d search for him, trying to pretend that you didn’t. You’d stare at him when you thought no one was looking. And I… I had to put a stop to that. I had to protect you, do you understand that now? I loved you from the very first sight, Echo. And I had to save you from him. I had to save you from yourself and I wish… God, I wish you’d just listen to me because look what he did.”
I blink at him. “You knew?”
He frowns. “I did, yes. As I said it was easy to see that you were —”
“No, about him. That he liked me. You knew that?”
“Yes.” He sighs sharply. “You don’t have to look so surprised. Like he did. Fuck, seriously. What did you both think, that I’m a moron? That I wouldn’t notice these things, your looks, your longing-filled sighs. Yeah, I knew.”
And then I ask a very strange, off-topic question. I don’t even know why it made it into my brain but it did and I say, “And the Halloween party?”
“What?”
“The one when you said he got you drunk and set girls on you. He,” I take in a trembling breath, “didn’t do that, did he? He didn’t…”
Lucas’s frown is thick, his features crumpled up. “What difference does it make now? That was years ago. That was —”
“Answer me,” I snap. “Did he or did he not do that?”
Another sharp sigh from him. “No, he didn’t. In his usual fashion, he was playing the babysitter that night, okay? I got drunk and I was very close to kissing this girl. And he stopped me. He reminded me that I had a girlfriend I needed to think about. Who wouldn’t kiss me, by the way. But that’s in the past, all right? And we’ve already talked about this. I don’t care about all that. And you shouldn’t either because I didn’t. I didn’t kiss anyone, and so can you come back to me? Can you finally see that I’m the right guy for you?”
“It was me,” I say then.
“What?”
“I kissed Reign that night. I was the one who started it. And I did it because I’d wanted to kiss him for a very long time. Because I loved him. Since the beginning. And I love him now.”
He freezes.
Goes still. At my confession.
That I only gave to hurt him.
Yes, I can admit that. I can fucking admit that I did it to hurt him.