I scrubbed my hands over my face, the vigorous movement releasing more of her scent from where it had coated my skin earlier.
“This is ridiculous.” I reached for the radio and turned it on to drown out the thoughts in my head before slipping the car into gear.
Suddenly, I just wanted to see my folks. They were all the way out in Pointsville, but that didn’t matter. I didn’t exactly have a reason to stick around Carwyn City tonight, and I had all the reasons to want to escape for a while.
It was late, but Mom never minded what time I turned up. She was always as happy to see me as I was to see her.
My car made the usual smooth ride between the city and my pack’s suburb. It was an hour away and much more like being in the country out here, far from the sprawling concrete jungle and high rises. It was a good mix of family homes and other, slightly bigger mansions, like the one my parents lived in.
I drew up to the gate and lowered the window so I could put the security code into the keypad and let myself onto the estate. The driveway wound its way to the front door, and I parked, looking up at the darkened front of the house.
I entered the house quietly, not wanting to disturb anyone, and I followed the glow of the light shining from the kitchen. Mom was in there, brewing a pot of tea, and she turned as I walked in.
“Oh, Patrick. Hi.” She approached me and lifted herself onto her tiptoes to press a kiss to my cheek. “How are you doing?” Purple smudges shadowed the delicate skin under her eyes, but she smiled anyway.
Everything else was so quiet.
I nodded and kept my voice low as I replied, “Always better for seeing you.” The line was smooth but no less true for that. I was always happy to see my parents, even under the circumstances I always found my dad in. “It’s quiet here tonight.” Although I probably shouldn’t have expected anything else with the lateness of the hour.
Her smile was tired before she responded, and she shrugged. “Your father and I are the only ones here.”
“How’s he doing?” It should have been the first thing I asked, but I’d spent a moment acclimatizing to being home.
She shrugged again, her shoulders thin under the voluminous nightgown she wore. “He’s quiet. You know how it is. Some days are better than others, but his depression is even more debilitating since his catatonia diagnosis, and that comes with physical problems of its own.”
I nodded. I’d spent too much time away and left Mom with too much to deal with. Dad increasingly struggled to move or even communicate effectively, and that couldn’t have been easy in any way for either of them, even with the professional care I ensured was on hand multiple times per day.
My earlier frustration at my business and personal situation was replaced with guilt. I’d neglected my family.
“Let me take his tea to him?” I held my hand out for the mug Mom had just poured.
She kissed me again. “I’m sure he’ll like that. I’ll be in my room if you need anything.”
“Sure thing.” I let her take the flight of steps ahead of me, and some of the tension released from her as she walked back into her room.
I continued to the room where my dad spent his time, the room I’d spared no expense converting to something superior to any local hospital to try to ensure his comfort. It was the very least I could do to provide for him.
He was sitting in a chair and facing the window, but there was no way he could have seen anything out in the dark night. Mostly only the room behind him was reflected in the glass, but he didn’t react as I walked in.
My heart clenched as I looked at the man who’d been my hero for so much of my life. Now he was little more than a shell of all he’d been. I had so many memories of being a child and sitting on his broad shoulders as he strode about his day.
“Hi Dad.” I kept my voice low, oddly respectful, like I’d lost him already.
He didn’t react and I moved closer, picking up a straw from the stash Mom kept close by so he’d be able to drink his tea.
The urge to confess almost choked me, and I cleared my throat. I hadn’t known why I’d driven here before, but I did now.
“I’ve met someone, Dad.” I sounded like a broken man, and the words opened the damn to so many memories. I grimaced. “Well, my wolf has. But I’m fighting it.”
Dad had chosen Saundra as my wife carefully, or so he’d thought. She should have been the key to cementing the fortune of the Silver Claw pack, but instead she’d systematically dismantled it, baiting me and sniping at me until I’d destroyed our home around her in a fit of temper I’d never repeated.
Although I’d left her untouched, I’d cost Dad his business, and Saundra still took a piece of me each month in the deal she and her dad had worked out.
And it had all been deliberate. Saundra and her father had cooked up the plan together. They’d destroyed me and taken everything my dad had worked for on purpose, and I’d never be able to make it right.
Not now.
Telling Dad I’d met someone else felt like a betrayal. Like I was moving on while he never could. He’d never be able to. His health wouldn’t allow it. He wouldn’t even get the dignity of a fresh start or be able to make a success of himself all over again.