Boomer gives me a small smile, letting me know he isn’t offended I nearly kicked him in the face and down to the mat.
It’s Ugly that calms me down with his muttered, “Idiot.”
I can’t help the laugh that escapes. It’s a rescue he isn’t even aware of. It’s exactly what I needed.
Ugly snickers which makes Boomer laugh, and I can’t help the smile that crawls across my lips. I’m so grateful for my friend and the time we got to spend together in Albuquerque. I knew I could always trust him not to pull any punches when it came to my injury.
He helped me up off the shower floor after a particularly physically draining PT session. It didn’t end the same way it did with Slick. He didn’t stick around to make sure I didn’t do it again. He cussed at me and told me to shave my sac because even a man missing half a leg has no excuse for having hairy nuts. The next day, he had applied all these little fucking sea life stickers to the bottom of the shower so I wouldn’t slip again. He was adamant about letting me know it was more for his own eyes than my safety.
He tells offensive jokes about my injury, laughing his ass off when others gasp and search the room to gauge my reaction. The others haven’t come around yet, but I hope they do. I think with therapy, I’ve come a long way with accepting my new normal. I wish everyone else would hurry and fucking catch up.
“If you guys can’t take this seriously, I’m going to ask you to leave.”
My eyes snap up to Slick, my cock thickening at the growl in her voice.
“You can’t be disruptive for everyone else.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Ugly says in a way that makes Boomer laugh again.
Her eyes bounce between Ugly and Boomer. She never once looks at me.
Her pettiness should enrage me, but it makes me sad.
I fucking ruined everything.
Having sex with Slick did exactly what I knew it would do. Before, she’d shake her head and smile. She wouldn’t avoid eye contact. She’d glare at me in that way that let me know she knew I was at the center of whatever silliness was taking place. Now, she can’t even look me in the eye. I don’t get the vibe that she’s angry with me. I don’t think the absence of attention comes from a hateful place because I called things off. I seriously feel like I don’t even come up on her radar.
For weeks, she watched my every move. For weeks, we spent so many hours in my fucking bed, naked and sweaty.
It’s almost like she got what she was after and now I don’t exist.
It stings in a way I didn’t know was possible. It also makes me realize that Brynn Sullivan managed to get under my fucking skin when I wasn’t paying attention.
I watch her mouth turn up in a grin, and I’m helpless at not following her line of sight. It lands on my best friend who is acting like a child and sticking his tongue out at her. I narrow my eyes at him, knowing I will completely lose my shit if anything ever happens between the two of them.
This whole situation is a complete fucking disaster, and I have no one to blame but myself.
It wasn’t her fault she has completely kissable lips.
It’s not on her that I was hurting and needed something to ease not only the physical pain but the uncommon emotions I had no idea how to deal with other than pushing my agenda to have sex with her.
And she’s not to blame that I jumped the gun and told her I couldn’t have sex with her anymore.
Chapter 33
Slick
I hate that I’ve always stuck around until every last person leaves a yoga class.
The mat stayed vacant beside Ugly for the first ten minutes today, but, much to my chagrin, Aro finally showed up.
It took everything I had not to look at him, especially when he and Ugly started acting like idiots. They even got Boomer involved today which is completely out of character for the man.
Now, instead of scurrying out like Ugly, Boomer, and the rest of the people do, Aro takes his sweet fucking time.
I know what many of the couples do after one of my classes. The sexual tension in the air as they watch their partners bend and stretch is thick enough to choke on. Today was no different, despite how much things have changed. I still felt his eyes on me, but I couldn’t look at him. If I did, he’d see the pain I’m having a hard time controlling in my eyes. It’s a weakness I’d rather not show because it’s exactly what he predicted. I got in too deep, felt too much, and that’s something I need to deal with, not shove into his lap. My feelings about a certain situation aren’t his to have to deal with.