I shake my head at his reasoning. “That’s not how it works. Unmanaged trauma will always return until it’s resolved, and even with personal growth and understanding of it, it can sneak back up. In order to manage—”
“I said no.”
His hands start to roam, first cupping my ass before his mouth meets that soft spot on my neck. Of course he’s more than capable of reading a woman’s body, and I’m almost putty in his hands, but my phone rings from my bedroom.
“Seriously?” he snaps when I climb off his lap.
I don’t answer him as I leave the room, grateful for whomever is calling because resisting that man even during the times it would be most crucial is damn near impossible.
My heart picks up like I’ve been caught doing something wrong when I see Kincaid’s name on the screen.
I clear my throat before answering as if it will dislodge that sense of dread stuck there.
“Yes, sir?”
“Just calling for an update. Haven’t heard from you in a few days.”
My eyes dart to the doorway when it darkens with Aro’s strong form.
“Sorry about that,” I quickly apologize. “Nothing much has changed. He’s still making progress in PT.”
“And the panic attacks?”
“He’s still having them,” I confess, feeling like I’m betraying Aro with the words.
Silence grows thick and heavy through the line before he speaks. “So, he’s still not going to counseling?”
“He could have panic attacks even after attending counseling, but no. He still refuses to go.”
Aro narrows his eyes at me, anger evident in every feature on his handsome face.
“And he won’t talk to you about any of it?”
I refuse to lie to this man in an effort to protect whatever I’ve convinced myself is happening between Aro and me. I also won’t compromise any aspect of his health because I enjoy sleeping with the man. “He shuts me down every time I try.”
I don’t hear what Kincaid has to say because I’m too busy having my heart broken when Aro shakes his head at me, disappointment clear on his face, before walking away.
Chapter 22
Aro
If I ever needed a reminder that I’m nothing but a job to Slick, I got it.
I hate the way it makes me feel because she didn’t betray me as a teammate. She did exactly what is expected of her in that regard by ratting me out to whoever was on the phone.
She betrayed me as a woman, as a lover, and I never imagined she had that sort of hold on me until she locked eyes with me and told the truth.
I no longer have to wonder who she was speaking to when my phone rings only moments after entering my room.
I’ve been waiting for this call, but my heart pounds in my chest as I pick the phone up.
“Yes, sir,” I say, my hand trembling.
I’ve busted my ass, sometimes to my own detriment, in an effort to get back into the fold with Cerberus, but Kincaid calling after being told I’m not going to counseling isn’t a good sign.
“How are you?” he asks.
“Great,” I say. “It’s getting easier to walk with the cane. My physical therapist thinks I may be able to get fitted with a temporary prosthetic next week.”
“That’s great to hear.”
Unwilling to be the one to bring up my lack of counseling, silence floats between us.
“How are things there?” I ask.
“The men are getting bored. We’re working through some changes, so I’m not letting anyone back into the field until we can get those things in place.”
I don’t know how to respond to that, so I don’t say a word.
“I know everyone misses you. We all do. Looking forward to your return.”
My heart flutters, my stomach flipping.
“My return?”
“Of course your return.”
He says the words as if I should’ve known all along that I was going to be welcomed back at the clubhouse.
“When will that be, sir?”
“You have a few more weeks of PT left, but you’re a little behind on the counseling sessions.”
And there it is. The threat is in his voice without the man even having to say the words.
I open my mouth to argue, but I know it will be pointless. Cerberus has always prided themselves on making sure their members are mentally sound to continue doing what we need to do. No one batted an eye a few months ago when Grinch stayed behind for a couple of missions because his head wasn’t in it after reconnecting with Grace. Apollo took time off after April had her baby because worrying about his family while working wasn’t the best thing for the team. I know I should feel no different, but it’s clear I don’t have much control over my own emotions.
“Counseling may take a while,” I say, hoping he can read the confession in my tone.
“I’ll need you to show some progress, Josh.”