“Yes, and the one on Aria.”
“It was mere due diligence, Maeve. I was going to show you. You know everything in those folders already.”
She shakes her head. “I get it. Rexy was the same way. I’m not upset about the folders.”
It’s the first time she’s brought him up so casually, without any sadness. “Oh?”
“Do you really want me to adopt Turner? I saw the form, and we haven’t talked about it before. Technically I’m his aunt, so is it even a possibility?”
Emotion clogs my throat. “You weren’t supposed to see that. It was just in case something happened to me. I was going to wait until much later, after we get married even.” I blow out an annoyed breath. “I’m so sorry you saw that before we could talk about it.”
“What else have you done in case something happens to you?”
How does she know? “I put you in my will, but there’s nothing in there about where Turner will go. It stills, says my mom. I wouldn’t change that without talking to you first.”
“If it’s legal, I want to adopt him. We need to tell him about Rena and how I’m actually his… aunt, first though. Maybe when he’s older? What do you think?”
I open my mouth to respond, then close it again. Licking my lips, I stare at her. “I don’t think you can get any closer to perfection than you are right now. I thought that would have scared the fuck out of you. Nope, just made me want you to be in his life even more.”
“I love him. Why would it scare me? It’s no different than agreeing to marry you. Being his step-mom is something that adds to his life, adopting him and being his legal mom is so much more. He deserves the best parents in the world and I don’t know if I can be the best, because despite what you think, I’m not perfect. Nowhere even close.”
“You always surprise me,” I admit, sighing loudly. “I think he’s lucky to get you in any form, Maeve.”
“All I ever wanted my entire childhood was a mom who loved me. A mom who wanted me. One to tuck me in and kiss my elbow when I fell on the playground. A mom who would listen to me rattle on about my boring day and pretend it was the most amazing story in the world. I wanted a mom so bad that I wished for one anytime I had a chance.” Maeve chokes up. “Do you remember at the ranch when Turner said his birthday wish was coming true?”
Narrowing my eyes, I think back to something that seems like a lifetime ago. “Yeah. I do. I forgot to ask him what the wish was.”
Maeve turns to look at me and a tear cuts down his cheek. “He told me. He wished for a mom.”
Closing my eyes against the onslaught of emotion, I try to keep the emotions in check. “Of course, he did.”
“I want to be that for him. It’s too late for my childhood, but it’s not for him, and who better than someone who shares his blood?”
Maeve pulls off the road onto the long driveway that leads to her house and parks the car. She doesn’t move to turn off the car. “Yes. I think we tell him the whole story and if at the end he’s okay with it, we sign the papers and make it official.”
“I want to do it and give it to him as a present for his birthday.”
Leaning over, I kiss her cheek. “You might not be perfect, but you’re pretty damn close. I love that idea.”
She sits there, deep in thought for what seems like forever. “Thank you for saying that. Do you want to go in? We can go back home, I just wanted to get that off my chest.”
Now I look at her like she’s crazy. “Maeve, tell me you don’t want to go in there and fuck wild and loud and we can go home right now, but if you’re scared or worried that’s something else entirely.”
Instead of replying, she opens the door and slams it. She looks over her shoulder as she walks to the front door, jiggling the keys in her hand to find the right ones. I hop out as quickly as possible and follow her inside. Locking the door behind me takes some work after all of the bolt locks were installed. It’s like a NYC apartment in a bad neighborhood. A chill prickles my skin as I walk up the stairs. It doesn’t happen every time I’m here, and there’s no way to determine if it’s going to bring me back to that day. The spot Rena where was standing is empty and I let out a breath. Maeve is in the wine cabinet when I arrive at the top. I ask if she thinks about that day when she’s here. She says she doesn’t think about it unless it’s brought up, like I just did, but I’m not sure I believe her.
“Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?” I ask, watching her fill a glass and take a sip. She gazes at me over the rim.
Maeve stretches her neck to one side, exposing it, forcing me to forget where I’m at and what happened. Now all I can think of is her. Twisting the stem of the glass in between two fingers, she gazes at me with an unreadable emotion. “Sometimes you love me so much it confuses me,” she says. “I wonder why. How is it possible? Then I open my heart and feel how much I love you. That’s the only thing that I can do to make sense of it.”
I cross to her, slowly stalking across the living room, over the spot Stavros died, to reach her in the corner by the fireplace. “I’m glad you can make sense of it,” I reply, swallowing hard. “Because I love you more than is reasonable and there’s no way to explain it any other way.”
Her gaze flicks up to meet mine. “I’m still getting used to it. But Lincoln,” she asks, setting her glass down on a side table. “Were you celibate because you were waiting for Rena? Then you met me and subconsciously you thought, well next best thing is this woman who resembles the woman I love? Humor me here, it’s me trying to make sense of our relationship.”
I take her hands in mine. “Because of what Riley said?”
She nods, big blue eyes shining up at mine. “No. I told you the truth on our first date. It was my decision and it had nothing to do with anyone except Turner.” I lean in and kiss her neck on the spot I haven’t stopped thinking about since she exposed it. Her cool skin raises where my lips left.
“You really did fall in love with just… me?” I’ve never seen her this vulnerable before. Not quite this exposed in her desire for validation. It breaks my heart and heals it at the same time. She’s so innocent and beautiful.