“Easy for you to say. She’s not your student.”
Hannah smiled, stroking a thumb across the back of Caroline’s hand. “Don’t think too much into it. Edie would be discreet if we asked that of her. And she wouldn’t expect any kind of special treatment. Not that you’d give her it.”
“Hannah.”
“Yeah?” Those blue eyes shone as Hannah’s gaze bored into Caroline.
“Can we give it some more time? We need to be absolutely certain here. I won’t hurt Edie because we couldn’t be adults and make the right decision. She means too much to me.”
“Sure.” Hannah slid her hand away from Caroline’s, turning back to the TV. “I just feel really good about this, and I’m sorry you don’t feel the same way. But only you know what you see in your future.”
Caroline hadn’t meant to upset Hannah, but it appeared to be exactly what she’d done. “Part of me sees you in my future, Hannah.”
Hannah nodded slowly, chewing the inside of her cheek. “But part of you doesn’t.”
“I’m trying.” Caroline placed a hand on the back of Hannah’s neck, stroking her fingertips against her shoulder. “I really am.”
Hannah suddenly brushed a hand across her cheek as a tear fell. Caroline tried to lean in, but Hannah shifted away. “Please, don’t.”
“Hannah…”
“You’re trying, and I get that, but if you have to try…then I’m not sure I’m the right person for you. This should be effortless. It should be exciting. Trying shouldn’t really come into it.”
Caroline understood why Hannah felt that way, but she’d come out of a relationship that had destroyed the very person she was. In the months after leaving Naomi, Caroline wasn’t sure how she could function alone. In the two years that had passed, she’d not only blocked out the idea of finding love, but she’d locked her heart away too. While she wanted Hannah to be the one who made her happy, Caroline hadn’t expected this whirlwind romance. Because that’s how it felt to her. Unexpected, uncertain, but yes…exciting. Whatever the outcome of it, she could safely say that Hannah had excited her.
“I think maybe we need a deeper conversation here,” Caroline said, sitting forward. “Not tonight, I’m not sure you have much attention left for me given how I’ve upset you, but it is needed. At some point.”
“When I fall, I fall hard. At least, that’s how it’s been in the past. I’ve always fallen for the wrong people, but you…I felt differently about you the moment we met. I’m sorry. I’ll give you the space you need.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing, but I felt that connection with you the moment we met, too. So please, don’t think that I’m trying to push you away. Life with and after Naomi was incredibly hard for me, so I’m processing. Can you allow me that?”
Hannah lifted Caroline’s hand and kissed her knuckles. “You mean a lot to me. I can allow you whatever you need from me, Caz. If that’s more or less, say the word. I don’t want to do anything to jeopardise this with you.”
Caroline chanced leaning in again, smiling into a kiss when Hannah didn’t back away. “You mean a lot to me, too. This isn’t about you, you’re perfect, but I want to get it right. For me. For us.”
“Come here.” Hannah opened her arms to Caroline, laying them down lengthways on the couch. “I like having you in my life. We can take this at your pace.”
Chapter19
Caroline turnedher watch towards herself, groaning when she realised she still had an hour before her train reached the station. She’d decided to be bold, to travel down to London and surprise Hannah now that her court case was almost over, but the journey could have been better. She’d already get in later than expected because of a delay on the line an hour into the journey. And now she sat here wondering if she’d done the wrong thing. Hannah was away with her boss. Her successful lawyer boss. A woman who, by the sounds of it, didn’t take kindly to Hannah being interrupted at work.
But Hannah wasn’t working this evening, and she was only travelling home tomorrow, so Caroline needn’t worry. Juliet surely couldn’t command Hannah’s time at night, too. Could she?
She can try, but Hannah’s all mine once I get to that hotel.
Caroline grinned, watching the world go by outside the carriage window. Rolling hills, clear blue sky. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d done something so spontaneous. Naomi would have scoffed at Caroline’s arrival if she’d done something like this for her. But Hannah wouldn’t do that. No, Hannah would have that adorable grin and that sexy gaze waiting for her. It was her default setting when Caroline was around.
Her phone buzzed on the table.
We won! Hannah x
Caroline smiled, instantly pressing reply. Hannah had been nervous as the week progressed, her first court case approaching since she’d started working for Juliet. But Hannah was gifted in many ways, her career included, so Caroline hadn’t worried for one moment. All Hannah could do was the very best. And as Caroline had explained to Hannah, it was Juliet’s reputation on the line. Not Hannah’s.
That’s amazing! I’m so happy for you. Caz x
Juliet has already called the hotel and ordered champagne. What a change to my old job! Hannah x
Caroline felt a slight pang of jealousy hit her in the stomach. Juliet got to wine and dine Hannah last night. There wasno wayshe was getting her tonight too!