I let out a humorless laugh and said, “Me, too, and knowing I’ll never be making it again makes me happier than you know.”
She looked at me with a serious face. “And he gave up all rights to her?”
I nodded. “Yep, which really shouldn’t surprise me, but I have to admit it did.”
Mom shook her head. “I never did like that boy.”
“I’m beginning to think I didn’t either. Maybe I was in love with the idea of love.” I lowered my voice, so Liliana couldn’t hear me. “Tim is in love with his dick and how many women he can put it in.”
With wide eyes, my mother pointed her finger at me. “A well-bred southern lady doesn’t say that sort of thing.” She leaned closer and whispered, “Unless we’re alone and out of earshot of kids and men. I taught you better, Saryn.”
Laughing, I kissed her on the cheek. “Yes, you did, Momma. He brings out the worst in me.”
Daddy was slipping Liliana into her highchair as Momma quickly started cutting up the lasagna she had made. She pointed to the refrigerator and said, “Get out the salad and dressing, will you, honey?”
“Yep.”
My father walked up to me and kissed me on the forehead. “You and Liliana are better off without him, sweetheart. You’re home now and it’s a brand-new start.”
I smiled and gave him a reassuring nod. It wasn’t like I was sad. Far from it. Six months after we got married, I’d caught Tim in a lie. He’d told me he was working late, and I had seen him sitting in the window of restaurant with a pretty blonde who couldn’t have been more than twenty-one. He said it was a work thing, and he’d been nervous that if he told me he had to wine and dine some young executive I would worry. I wanted to believe him, but a small part of me knew he was lying. My heart had been broken by a boy in high school, one of my brother’s friends, and Tim had been there to help mend my broken heart. The whole reason I’d followed him was to avoid staying in Boerne. To avoid the heartache I truly never did get over. Deep down inside, I think Tim knew I never got over the hurt Truitt Carter caused me.
Tim and I had dated since high school. We dated through college, both of us going to Texas A&M: me getting my degree in nursing, and Tim getting a degree in marketing. He’d gotten a job in Dallas, and the moment we graduated, we moved five hours away from our home town. In my mind it was a good thing. There was nothing in Boerne for me anymore.
But I ended up more miserable than I thought I would. I hated Dallas, while Tim thrived in the big city. We lived in a nice house in the suburbs, did the whole neighborhood potlucks and fancy business dinners when Tim’s job required it. I worked at one of the hospitals as a labor and delivery nurse, then moved to the NICU. I thought I could make our relationship work. I fought for us to be happy, but, at some point, it became clear to me we were far from happy together.
After living in Dallas for two years, I told Tim I didn’t think things were working and that I was going to move back to Boerne. He dropped down on one knee and asked me to marry him. My first thought was to say no…boy, how I should have gone with my gut. I didn’t though, and we got married at twenty-five. Two years later, I was pregnant with Liliana.
To be honest, we hadn’t meant to get pregnant. We went on a trip to Ireland, a last-ditch attempt on my part to see if things would work out. We both knew our marriage was failing. Tim worked all the time and I found myself living practically alone.
Then the rumors of his roaming eyes, hands, and dick, eventually made their way back to me. I told Tim we needed to separate, he said we needed a vacation. I ended up getting pregnant in Ireland when I stupidly forgot my birth control pills. I thought it would be okay. It was the first time we’d had sex in months, and the sad part was, we only made love once in Ireland. Both of us drunk. Talk about luck of the Irish.
I was scared to death when I found out I was pregnant. I was having a baby with a man I could hardly stand to be around. I was angry with myself for always letting Tim talk me into giving our marriage one more chance.
I knew the real reason it wasn’t working. There was a ghost between us. I was in love with someone I fell for at fourteen years of age. Someone I dreamed of having a life with. Someone I dreamed of while still married to my husband. Deep down inside I felt like I was cheating on Tim. It was probably the reason I ignored all the signs that he was the one actually cheating.