Trying to keep my mom satisfied? Good luck with that, buddy.
“Mom?” I tell her rather than ask. “I need to talk to you…Alone.” Making her click her tongue and roll her eyes, but then she suddenly grins to herself.
As if she has something of her own she wants to share.
Mrs. C walks on with Lucy to the corral, and Ben goes back to the porch, loading up the rental car we came in with our luggage.
Mom grabs my arm and pulls me over to some nearby bushes, speaking over me as I open my mouth.
Hoping the right words will come out.
But it’s clear she’s going to speak first. As usual.
“Honey… Now don’t get upset or weird. But… Well. Ben and I…,” she starts, stopping herself mid-sentence and blushing when she hears herself say his name.
“Ben and I... Oh! There’s no other way to say it. Ben’s asked me to go to Baltimore with him. I think he might propose!” she says between her teeth, stifling a squeal as she grips my arm so tight I can feel her nails about to break my skin.
It’s not quite what I expected to hear, but surely that means I can just stay here, right?
Wait for Mack so we can just pick up where we left off.
Right?
“So, I rang the airline and swapped my ticket so I can go with Ben. You’re getting an earlier flight, so we have to leave…right now otherwise I’ll miss Ben’s plane!” She orders me with a smile.
Leaving me totally speechless, and without Mack nearby, I don’t know what to think, let alone what to do or even say.
All my courage. All the strength I felt inside whenever Mack was around seems to have vanished. As if he’s some natural force like the wind or rain.
Something that comes and goes, but maybe you never really can keep it forever.
Either way, I feel like a five-year-old kid again.
Being ordered about and bundled into the car by my mom, with her obviously new boyfriend following behind in his rental car.
Mrs. Corbett only waves us off as we leave.
A woman of her years, living on the land? It’s just another day at the office for her, and I can’t help but think she might even be glad to see the back of another carload of city folk.
But Mack….
I’m numb by the time we’re on the open road, only murmuring an occasional grunt as my mom talks at a million miles a minute.
Planning her own future with Ben, while I’m still trying to figure out how the heck I let any of this happen.
By the time I’m angry enough instead of stunned like a fish, it’s too late.
We’re at the airport, and mom’s literally pushing me forward with my bags once we drop off the rental car.
“We’ve really got to go, Tina,” Mom says for the hundredth time. Only seeming to relax once she reaches her gate.
Ben in tow carrying all their luggage.
My mom looking like she’s having the thrill of her life.
The kind I’m supposed to be having right now, with Mack.
My Mack.
“I’ve put some money in your account,” she murmurs in my ear confidentially once their flight starts to board.
“Get a cab straight home and I’ll call you later,” she says, widening her eyes to emphasize her words.
I should be happy for her. I mean. I am. And it’s just as well Mom and Ben are leaving first because another minute of their song and dance, and I’d scream.
Ben mumbles a polite goodbye, and mom waves at me, flapping her hand as if the whole world’s there to see her off.
But I only feel my own emotions welling up once the gate closes. And I even wait until I watch their plane take off before I rush to the nearest restroom.
Sitting in an empty stall and crying my guts out.
I get a few knocks on the door, girls asking if I’m okay. But I don’t know how long I sit there. Feeling like I need Mack now more than ever but thinking maybe I really am just too innocent and unknowing.
I mean, a man like him with a girl like me?
It’s like something you’d read in a dollar novel. That stuff just never happens in real life.
So maybe I just need to be grateful for my first time being with someone as amazing as Mack?
But I can tell already, this isn’t something I can just get over.
So, when I hear my flight boarding call, it’s with a heavy heart and even heavier, dragging step that I clean my face up and defog my glasses.
Sighing to myself like every single, lonely girl the world over does once she realizes that she just has to keep going.
I’m last in line to board, trying not to think about anything anymore because it hurts too much.