Chapter1
Evan
Istand in the center of the McCarthy Security office, surrounded by office equipment. The tiny whine of the printer, the refrigerator in the break room, and the fan on the ceiling seem much louder than they actually are. But I’m still getting used to this. I’m used to working in an office instead of at base, out in the open, with ten pounds of gear and a gun on my hip.
One month and three days. That’s how long it’s been since I was honorably discharged from the United States Army. All it took was one bad fall over six months ago to change my life forever. I had a concussion, but the doctors said I would be back at it in just a few weeks. No one can explain or in turn fix the extreme vertigo I started to experience. No matter what I tried, it didn’t work. Numerous doctors, physical therapists, medicines and even MRIs that showed nothing–nothing could explain why I had it or how to stop it. Yes, they finally found a medicine that helped it and made the symptoms more tolerable, but not enough that I could stay on active duty. Let’s face it, no one wants a man with sudden bouts of dizziness and nausea to be the one having another person’s back. No, I understand that. But it didn’t make it any easier. Being in the service was my dream. Ever since I was little, playing army men, I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. A badass willing to die for his country.
But my dream died one month and three days ago. I was discharged. Honorably, but still discharged. So I moved back home to Whiskey Run. Bought a fixer upper and started working with my brother in our family’s security business. It’s been in our family for generations, and even when we were little, our dad had us by his side, doing security and installations. It’s second nature for me, and I stepped back into the role easily. I miss the activity and excitement, but I have to admit it’s nice being back in Whiskey Run. It’s changed a lot in the four years that I was gone. It seems it’s more of a tourist town now with the way people come to tour the distillery and sample the Blaze Whiskey – which is what Whiskey Run is now famous for.
“Hey, you free to do a quote over at Red’s Diner?”
My brother Sam interrupts my thoughts, and I nod in agreement without even thinking about it. I’ve discovered since I got back home, I do way better if I stay busy. Of course my idea of staying busy has been working in the office and away from the public, but I know I can’t stay like this. I’m going to have to go out and work eventually. “Yes, sure.”
Sam is writing on the white erase board all of the day’s jobs with his back to me. “Good. Violet says she hasn’t seen you since you got back so I told her I’d see if you were free.”
“So she’s taken over the diner now?”
“Yep, since her parents moved to Florida and retired. Around three years ago, I guess. Anyway, you’ll be surprised when you see the place. She’s made a lot of changes... good ones, though.”
I feel like I’ve known Violet my whole life, and I feel a little guilty that I haven’t gone in to see her yet. She’s ten years older than me and the same age as Sam, but even with the age difference, I still would call her a friend. I can’t explain why I’ve avoided people and places since I got back, but I have. Maybe I don’t want the curious or pitying looks, and sure enough, if I go to Red’s Diner where almost everyone in town eats at least once a week, that’s exactly what I’ll get. But I can’t hide forever.
“Yeah, I’ll go. I should have already gone in to see Violet anyway,” I tell Sam, and even I can hear the guilt in my voice.
He keeps flipping through the pages of his notepad and writing on the board as he mutters, “That’s what she said.”
“So what is she looking for? Did she say?”
He flips a few more pages. “Yeah. She needs her alarm updated for the front and back doors, and she’s wanting to add a digital camera so she can access it from her phone.”
“Great. Easy enough. I’ll head over shortly.”
I grab my notebook off the table and am about to walk into the supply room when Sam stops me. “Hey Evan, I know it’s going to take you awhile to get adjusted to this, but I want you to know I’m glad you’re home.” He fans his hands around the office, but I know he’s talking about more than just the office. He’s talking about all of it—moving back home, leaving the Army, joining the family business.
“I know, Sam. Thanks for taking it easy on me this past month. I’m going to start earning my keep. And I’m glad to be back home too.”
He nods, but it’s obvious by the skeptical look in his eyes that he doesn’t fully believe me. Hell, I don’t either. But what choice do I have? I don’t have one. So I’m going to make the best of it starting today.
* * *
Sierra
I blow out a breath as I stare out the window of the Whiskey Run Public Library. If I stand in a certain corner, slide halfway behind a bookshelf, and look to the corner of Main Street and Bruce Street, I can see the front door to McCarthy Security. Evan McCarthy is home. I knew as soon as he got here. I was at Red’s eating lunch with Violet when a woman came from the hair salon saying she’d heard that Evan McCarthy was back in town and this time for good. She didn’t have all the details except that he was honorably discharged from the army and was going back to work at his family’s security firm.
Everyone was abuzz, excited that our town hero was home, but all I could do was worry. I knew that Evan had planned on being a lifer. He had no intentions of ever leaving the army, so the fact that he’s home made me more than worried about him. Not that I could let him know. No, I would have to talk to him to do that. And that’s one thing I don’t do. I don’t talk to Evan McCarthy. I may have watched him all growing up, I may have even helped him in English class a time or two. But that’s it. We were exact opposites in high school, and he barely knew I existed.
From that day one month ago, I have spent more time at the front window of the library looking out, just hoping for a glance of Evan McCarthy. He’s laid low since he got back, and the buzz of him being here has started to die down. No one talks about it anymore. Well, no one but me. I’ve never hidden the fact from Violet that I’ve had a crush on Evan since we were in high school together. Violet, who was in school with his older brother and in turn friends with him, has done everything to encourage me, even making me feel in small part there’s a chance. She insists he would be crazy not to give me a chance. But then I’ll leave from our book club meeting where we talk about books and gossip, and reality sets in. I’m the book nerd, the town librarian. I like order and planning. Evan was the star quarterback in high school. He dated the head cheerleader and was always with the in crowd. I assume he hasn’t changed that much since graduating, and so I know I’m way out of my league.
Before I let the thoughts drown me, I remember how far I’ve come. I’ve quit comparing myself to others. I’ve quit being insecure about my weight, and I’ve learned to love the person I am. I’ve accepted that I’m socially awkward and most usually say the wrong thing. I’m me, and that’s all I need to be. But now that Evan’s back, I can sense my old insecurities coming back, and I want to kick myself for it. The stuttering, quiet girl that used to hide her eyes in a book all the time is rearing to come back, and I refuse to go back to the insecure, self-conscious woman that I used to be.
On that note, I gather the books that Violet requested and put them in a bag over my shoulder. I’m looking forward to delivering her books, having a slice of her famous cake, and catching up with one of my closest friends.
I make a point when I walk out of the library not to even glance over at the security firm. No, that’s a dream I need to give up on. I keep my head pointed in the opposite direction with my shoulders squared. I look as if I’m ready to take on the world... now if only I felt like it too.
Red’s Diner is only a block away. When I walk in, Violet is wiping off the counter, and she smiles when she sees me. The closer I get, the more it looks as if something is on her mind, something she’s worried about. One thing I’ve learned about Violet is she’s a very private person. I found out she was married, by accident really, but I’ve never met her husband, and even though I’d never gossip to anyone about my friend, I still wonder how she was able to get married and no one knows about it. So instead of asking her, I lift the bag off my shoulder to show her the books I’d brought. “Hey, Vi! I have those books you wanted.”
Violet gestures to the almost empty diner. “Thank you. I didn’t think I would be able to make it over there today, so I really appreciate you bringing them.” I don’t question her, though. I’m happy to come see her and chat.
I pull out one of the books and wiggle my eyebrows at her. It’s a romance with a naked man chest on the cover.