I took it, gratefully. “Can I give you…” but she waved my hand offering money away.
“Thanks, honorary grandma!”
“I like that!” she said, smiling widely now.
I arrived at the hospital laden with plastic bags full of the frozen treats. It was way too much, of course. I went up to the children’s ward and drew attention where I went. When I reached Zoë’s room I went in expectantly, only to be greeted by an empty bed. With neat sheets drawn tightly over the mattress. I felt my heart skip a beat.
“Over here!” I heard Nikki calling me from the room right across. She came out to get me.
“You should see your face!” she smiled at me, all rosy cheeks, and mischievous eyes. “It’s just a tonsil op!”
“Yes, but… the doctor said… complications,” I mumbled.
She took my arm and led me to Zoë’s bed.
My little girl was lying there, looking very pale and drawn.
She opened her eyes. “Daddy,” she said with a small smile.
“How are you feeling?”
“Okay,” she said. Her eyes fluttered open and shut.
“She’s been like this all afternoon,” whispered Nikki. “Falls asleep and wakes up again. Nurse said it was normal.”
“Has she eaten anything yet?”
“Not yet. I’m guessing that is what you brought?”
“I think I may have over catered,” I said, a bit embarrassed.
“I have ice cream, gelato, and frozen yogurt in there. Almost every flavor you can imagine.”
“Any strawberry frozen yogurt?” I heard Zoë ask.
“Funny you should ask!”
I took out the frozen yogurt and opened it for her. Then I told Nikki and Zoë the story about how I had found it. We laughed and it helped ease the tension a bit. I was worried about Zoë, but she seemed to perk up after the frozen yogurt, asking for some ice cream as well.
“I think I will have some of that cookies and cream,” said Nikki, helping herself too.
“I remember when Simone and I were studying, we always permitted ourselves one tub of ice cream,” Nikki said.
“A whole tub!” I pretended to be shocked.
“It was study food! You need extra calories to help you study!” Nikki insisted.
“I didn’t know Simone ate ice cream,” Zoë said.
“Oh, only on some occasions.”
Nikki caught my eye, and I knew what she was saying. Simone had always been super conscious of her weight. Being around food all day and trying out different recipes had caused her to pick up a lot of weight early on in college. She set out to lose it all and became obsessively thin, counting every calorie and becoming almost gaunt. It was a control issue, I recognized it, having my own versions of it. Growing up the way we had, both of us dealt with the uncertainty and instability in different ways. Controlling her weight was a way of maintaining stability in her life but she almost overdid it.
“How is my favorite patient doing?” it was the same doctor from earlier in the day. He took a lookat Zoë’s throat, checked her blood pressure, and said she could go home as soon as she wanted to. We packed up her things and helped get her dressed while the nurses got a wheelchair for her.
“Can we leave some of the ice cream for the other children?” Zoë asked.
“Of course.”