I’ve never been with a woman like her. Hell, I haven’tbeenwith a woman in any sense other than horizontal (and vertical, or upside down…) in years. I dated Heather James for three months, and broke up with her the day after she told me she loved me. I didn’t love her. I wanted to. I tried. But my heart belonged to another. It’s belonged to another for years.
And the owner is standing in my bathroom, barefoot on the tile, brushing her teeth. After last night, things feel different. Different in a good way, that is. I didn’t fuck Lauren, I made love to her. And trust me, there is a difference.
I don’t let myself think too deep that often, but sometimes I wonder if I went for women the total opposite of Lauren to convince myself that’s what I want. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had plenty of fun drinking and fucking, but there’s always been a yearning in my heart for her, and it’s dark and cold and even I cannot fool myself into thinking it had been filled. I didn’t notice it most days, I’ve grown so accustomed to it.
But sitting here, looking at Lauren, the hole is closed up.
She turns the water off and turns around. I look down at my phone, pretending I wasn’t watching her.
“Look,” she says, putting her hands on her stomach. “I definitely look pregnant now. Kind of. Maybe?”
I smile and put my hands over hers. “Knowing that this wasn’t there before, I say you do.”
“So you’re saying other people are just going to think I have a gut?”
“Pretty much.” I shake my head and laugh. “Either way, I still find you to be fucking hot.” I kiss her. “Want to take the dogs for a walk before we get lunch?” I ask, knowing Lauren worries the dogs get bored being in my apartment all day.
“That’d be really nice. It’s beautiful outside for this time of year.”
She grabs the leashes and I grab my camera. Lauren raises an eyebrow when she sees it in my hand.
“I have no pictures of you,” I tell her. We have no pictures of us together, actually.
“I’m not photogenic,” she says and clips Vader’s leash onto his collar. “You can edit the pictures, right? Make me look good?”
I hang the camera over my shoulder and turn to Lauren, brushing hair out of her face. “You are beautiful, Lauren, in person and on film. It would be a shame to make any edits or changes.”
“Whoa,” she whispers, breath leaving her. “That’s a good line.”
I chuckle. “I wasn’t trying to give you a line.”
She tips her head. “Well, you did, and it worked.”
“Worked enough for sex?” I ask hopefully.
“More than enough. But,” she adds when she sees me raise my eyebrows and smile. “The dogs … they’re waiting.”
“Fine, let’s go.”
“Good answer,” she says, taking my hand, and we head out the door. There’s a nature preserve across from the apartment complex, with several miles of trails. I keep a hold of Lauren’s hand, and we walk in silence down the boardwalk that surrounds the lake. It stretches for a quarter mile then breaks away to a dirt path that winds through the trees.
“This is pretty,” Lauren says. “I’ve never been here.”
“It is. Peaceful too.”
“You go for walks?”
“I run on the trails.”
“Oh, right,” she says dryly. “You and Colin are all into working out and all that lame shit.”
I chuckle. “You really hate working out that much?”
She shrugs. “No. I mean, I like to stay in shape in case I happen to walk through a magical wardrobe that takes me to another land and go on adventures, but since the chance of that happening are pretty slim, I like my spare time spent on the couch. Preferably eating.”
“At least you’re honest. And a wardrobe?”
She turns, eyes wide. “You’ve never heard of Narnia?”