None of this felt right.
But she’d rather have a spanking than attempt to write lines.
“What are you doing?”
“Handing up my ass on a platter,” she muttered. “What does it look like I’m doing? Spank me already.”
“You really want me to spank you?” he asked.
“That’s what I said.” Yeah, she was aware she was being kind of bitchy, but nerves had her stomach in a knot and she just wanted to get it over with.
This wasn’t how she thought she’d feel getting her first spanking.
There was a long moment of silence. Then he placed his hand on the small of her back. She jumped into the air. He just kept his hand there, though.
“Shh, you’re all right, baby girl. No one is going to hurt you.”
She suddenly realized that she was breathing in big gulps, her body shaking. “Fuck.”
“You really think you’re ready for a spanking?” he murmured. “You jumped a foot in the air when I just touched you.”
“I just . . . I . . .”
“Stand up and turn around,” he commanded.
Taking a deep breath in, she turned. But she kept her gaze on his feet. She wasn’t ready to look at him.
“Look at me.”
She shook her head. Nuh-uh, she wasn’t doing that. Because she knew what would happen. She’d look up into those piercing eyes of his and she’d cave.
Then he reached out and touched her chin. She tried to stop herself from flinching, but she knew he likely felt that tiny jolt as he touched her.
“When I can touch you without you flinching back, then I’ll spank you,” he told her.
“I’m not sure that’s much of an incentive,” she attempted to joke.
“We don’t ever have to use spanking as a punishment if it scares you.”
This guy.
Killing her.
She forced herself to raise her gaze up to his eyes. “I’ve always been curious about spanking.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I don’t have any bad associations with it or anything. My dad liked to use his fists or his words to hurt me.”
“I never want you to associate anything we do together with him,” Zander told her. “I know I don’t always . . . have the best instincts. Understanding how other people feel and react, it can sometimes be a struggle.”
“I don’t know. I think you do a pretty good job of understanding how I’m feeling.”
“Well, you do wear your emotions on your face.”
“I do not!”
He just raised an eyebrow.