I nod. “I’m on two waiting lists. Apparently, eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy is popular, like the Atkins diet and organic vegetables. Everyone wants to do it.”
He snorts. “No one has ever compared it to that. Listen, there’s not much you can solve injustone session, but I notice you become more self-aware with each visit.”
“How does that help me?”
“You have a lot of pieces, but you don’t know where to put them or how to use them. As you learn about each one of them, you understand what to do with them.”
At first, it doesn’t make sense, but if I think of this as blocks, buildings, or a clock, I grasp the idea. I massage my temples. “Those are too many fucking pieces. I’ll never be able to put myself together.”
“It’s a work in progress, and maybe you also need to learn that while you’re working on yourself, you can live.”
“But what if I hurt them in the process? It already happened last week,” I remind him.
“This is why you have to open the lines of communication. You have to trust them so they can understand and maybe help.”
As if it’s easy, but I have to make it simple if I don’t want to lose them, don’t I?
ChapterSeventeen
Matthew
Keys,wallet, condoms, and my emergency bag.
I make sure nothing is missing, and I’m ready for anything with my girl. Tonight, we’re out on a date celebrating her counselor’s license. If I play my cards right, maybe I’ll get to fool around, and in case God loves methatmuch, I bring everything to stay overnight.
Opening the door, I encounter a bare-chested Tristan coming out of the elevator.
“You’re leaving?” The ripped abs do their daily job: make me hard.
There’s a bulge in my pants within two seconds. He glances down at my dick and grins. “When are you planning on coming back?” He runs his thumb over my jawline. “Or I can take care of it for you, babe? I’m so horny, I doubt we need to prep much.”
My balls twinge with the thought of taking him. I grab him by the shoulders and drag him inside the house, shutting the door. Pulling him in, my hand wraps around his neck, my fingers thread through his hair.
I press my lips against his, and he grasps my waist, pressing our bodies against each other. He moans against my mouth as I slide my tongue inside his hot mouth.
Lowering one hand, I get inside his gym shorts and pump him. I kiss him harder. Our mouths meld as our tongues thrust against each other. My dick is thick, engorged from the months of abstinence. In this frantic moment, I want to rip his clothes off and fuck him hard all night. The thought of Thea waiting for me stops me.
I pull back, releasing his pulsating cock, and push him far enough to level our sights. “Where are we standing, Coop?”
“What do you mean, dude? I live with you. We’re in a threesome.” He takes a step back and stares at me. “What am I missing?”
“I don’t want to be back in the fucking closet,” I say, lustful, frustrated. “I want us. Believe me, I do. But I won’t just pretend I’m dating Thea and you’re a good friend. I can’t do that again.”
“Does it matter? You’re about to go on a date with her.” His hand points at the bag I left next to the door.
“Planning on fucking?” He spits the words. “Who gives you the right to be her first?”
“Is that why you offered yourself to me?” I kick the fucking bag. “So I wouldn’t touch her?”
“Fuck you, Matthew. That’s not why and you should know it. It’s been months. Months,” he screams. “What are you and I waiting for?”
“I already told you. For you to stop holding back on me.” The pounding of my heart deafens the scream to stop this discussion.
Neither one of us was ready to open another drawer filled with issues. “You were almost there, but since your parents’ visit, you shut us down. Not only me, but also Thea.The whore.”
His mother was vicious with our girlfriend, and he didn’t kick her out of my house. I had to do it, be the jerk.
“I already talked tomygirlfriend about that,” he says, getting in my face. “My relationship with her is none of your fucking business. Are you sleeping with her?”