There’s so much hope in Mom’s voice, like she thinks my mood is because of her. I can sense how badly she wants me to be happy without knowing the reason I can’t be, not until Silas and I are out of the shadows.
“That sounds really awesome, Mom,” I say, though it will mean seeing Silas.
We said we wouldn’t, not until Dad knew.
From upstairs, a loud cheer comes. Dad’s voice rises.
Mom meets my eyes, smiling.
“I love it when he gets like this,” Mom says. “He’s so happy, so proud. I justloveit.”
“Me too, Mom,” I say, thinking of how she’d react if I suddenly ruined this moment and tarnished it forever with the truth. “So much.”
CHAPTERTWENTY-ONE
Silas
We sit around the largest table in the restaurant.
It’s a moody place, and the lights are kept dim while the tables are black obsidian, glistening and bright. There are silver decorations on the wall and some art, adding to the silver-lit aesthetic.
Maybe it’s not moody, then. Maybe I can’t enjoy this meal because just being here tears me right down the middle.
I sit next to one of our shareholders and a friend from our early action-sport days, and Lauren sits opposite me, next to her mom and little brother.
We try not to look at each other as the meal progresses. Finally, Julian makes his speech, and we all start to eat. The others sip champagne, and the chatter rises above the soft background music while I do my best not to stare at my woman.
The tattoo on my back stings, as if reminding me I need to look at her…her body and her gorgeous face are the only places my gaze belongs.
“That was some mad stuff,” Clive continues, referencing a jump I once made on my mountain bike. “I don’t know how you worked up the nerve to do that.”
I turn to him, realizing I’ve just been sitting here, staring at Lauren as he speaks. It’s difficult not to stare at her every single moment, to consume her.
“I tried not to think of anything other than what the sky would look like.”
“How’s that?” Clive asks.
I think of the dive with Lauren, our bodies connected as we fell…but it felt like soaring as if we were choosing our destination. That’s why I started to yell as pure joy burst out of me, something I don’t usually do.
“Not the technique. Not all the bad stuff that could happen.”
“That’s it, then. I was always scared of breaking my neck.”
I look past Clive to Julian, sitting a few people over. He meets my eye and raises his glass, smiling more widely than I’ve seen in years.
He’s always level-headed when it comes to business, but he knows this is a big deal, a huge life event that could catapult us into a new world of profits and potential.
“I should’ve worried about that more,” I tell Clive. “The consequences.”
Clive grins, thinking I’m talking about the jump. “You made it out alive. That’s all that counts.”
I’m still unsure if we will make it out of this, my woman and me.
Julian stands, tapping his fork against his glass. A warm chuckle spreads around the table when Tessa cups her hands and says, “Notanotherspeech.”
But she’s smiling warmly, her cheeks blazing with love. Julian looks at her, and I can see the unconquerable happiness there, the connection nothing could sever.
I never thought I’d feel it, but then I glanced at Lauren.