“Yes,” I answer, unable to lie to him. His manhood is almost where I need it. I try to wiggle my hips to get some friction, but he pushes more weight against me. He’s pinned me in place and grabbed my wrists. He’s holding them over my head with just one of his hands. The way he’s so big and so powerful makes me feel tiny and defenseless, like he owns me. But I love that idea, the thought that I could be West’s property to do with as he pleases.
He's teasing me too. He’s letting his fingertips trace the inside of my thigh through my tights. Every time he gets close to my pussy, he starts over again. He’s leaving me aching and eager with every gentle motion.
“Why, little girl?” His gaze searches my face, wondering about this game we’re playing. He wants to know everything about me and why I do the things I do. He wants to understand what I’m asking for and he’ll give it to me. It’s written in his expression.
“Because I need you.” I’m nearly ready to sob at this point. I need his lips on me and his fingers touching me. I need this man to give me everything. “Tonight. After the celebration, I wanteverything.”
He stops tracing my thigh, but he doesn’t let go of me. I’m still pinned between the wall and his hard body, completely at his mercy. He brushes a strand of hair from my face. “I’ve waited for you since I was eighteen. I’ll wait another decade if you just say the word.”
“Wait, does that mean you haven’t slept with any woman since you met me?” The idea pleases me more than it should. I never asked if he was seeing anyone. I purposely tried to ignore it any time the subject of girls came up around my brothers. I couldn’t stand the idea of knowing that some other girl was getting his kisses and touches.
He chuckles and the warm affection in his gaze wraps around me like a fuzzy blanket on a cold, winter night. “I never slept with anyone before you either.”
I can’t help grinning. No one has ever been with West. No woman has ever known him the way I’ll get to know him. “So, we’ll be each other’s firsts?”
“First and last,” he promises me.
“Kiss me again,” I plead. The ache in my body is now an inferno and I need this big man all over me. I’m pretty sure my panties melted away at some point between our conversation and now there’s only molten lava between my legs.
He sweeps his tongue into my mouth, kissing me desperately and passionately. He kisses me until I’m dizzy from a lack of oxygen and drugged on his taste. I’m just about to beg him to take me right here in the community center when the door opens.
We spring apart like we’re a couple of horny teenagers caught making out in the park after-hours. I adjust my rumpled clothes and try to finger-comb my hair. But it’s no use, our visitor will be able to tell exactly what was happening in here. Especially because West has a very prominent bulge in the front of his pants. No amount of adjusting will hide that monster.
“Hey, baby, where are you?” Mom calls out.
My stomach knots.She’ll figure this out.
Before I can say anything, Mom is coming into the room. Her big luggage-size purse is slung over her shoulder and her arms are loaded down with more of her quilts. She works all year to make them only to give them away. It’s the kind of selfless person she is. She pauses when she takes in West’s appearance and mine. There’s a knowing glint in her eye.
West doesn’t flinch or shrink down. He eyes his mom with calm reassurance. “I’m not ashamed of this.”
She sets her quilts down on a stack of boxes. “Let me talk to Cassie alone.”
I gulp in air, my heart slowing down. Is it still beating? Is this what it feels like when your heart breaks? Maybe it’s not a shattering. Maybe it just slowly stutters to a stop, and you can’t feel it anymore.
To my surprise, West looks to me. I’ve never known him to defy his mom. He respects her too much to challenge her, even when he believes she’s wrong. But he’s waiting for my approval. Just like that, I realize I’m the woman he’ll look to now, the one he listens to first. I wonder if she’ll hate me for that.
I give him the slightest nod.
He leans forward to brush a kiss across my forehead. “I’ll finish up those changes we talked about.”
He moves to leave the room but pauses before he does. He whispers something to his mom and her face lights up. He’s always known how to make her smile.
Then he leaves the room, closing the door behind himself. The doorknob clicks into place and we’re alone.
My mom focuses her attention on me. She studies me, her curls bouncing when she tips her head. Her hair is red now, no streaks of gray. She must have made it to the salon today.
I wait for her to say something first but we just end up staring at each other. She’s looking at me as if she’s never seen me until this moment and it guts me. I live in her house. I call her mom. I make pecan pies with her every Saturday night. “Do I have to leave now?”
She frowns, the lines on her face becoming more prominent. They weren’t always there. But after Dad, everything changed. Now they’ve both aged a century in just a few weeks. “You mean, move out of the house?”
My throat is clogged and it’s hard to get out the words. “Do I have to leave the ranch?”
“Why would you do that?”
She’s going to make me say it. Make me face the truth. “Because I like West. I know you don’t want me to be with him. You warned him away from me years ago when I first came to live with all of you. And I understand. I’m not your real daughter. I’m not anybody’s daughter.”
I don’t belong to anyone. I was starting to think maybe I belonged to West, that we would be together. But I can’t ask him to leave his parents. They need him.