It’s not the best sex, but it’s better than fucking random men who might skin me alive and toss me into a lake where I’d never be found.
He’s reliable, and I’m his dirty little secret. So I’ll continue to do what he wants even if that means not getting what I want. I’m used to being a secret.
I flip back toward the beginning of the book and see another entry from last summer.
Dear Diary,
May 10th
Sin hates me. Has since we were kids. Too bad I dream about him in the most inappropriate situations. When I started getting myself off, I’d close my eyes and think of him. I’d imagine it was him doing all the nasty and depraved things to me. But I had to stop that. It was just tainting my expectations of what I thought Sin could be capable of if ever given the chance. I’d rather never know that kind of letdown if I’m being honest with myself.
That’s all I have—myself. There’s no one I can talk to about what I’ve done, or who I want. Kira would be so mad at me if she knew I imagined her brother treating me like a piece of meat to use however he wanted. Sin would think I’m crazy, possibly pathetic.
So I’ll keep writing down my thoughts and fantasies as if they were their stories. My fictional characters might as well enjoy themselves.
I close the notebook and look over at her. She’s still sound asleep, tied up with duct tape on her bed.
“Here’s another one. Looks older,” Jayce states, closing a drawer to her desk.
I hold out my hand and he throws it to me. I open the first page. My heart starts to race when I see it’s dated two years ago. The night I was assigned to kill for the Lords.
Dear Diary,
August 12th
A man killed Daddy last night. I think he thought I was going to rat him out. But that wasn’t going to happen. I’m glad he’s dead. He was a sorry son of a bitch who deserved a horrible death. A bullet to the head was kind.
I let the man fuck me with his gun. It was dirty, raw, and therapeutic in a way. Even though it sounds fucked up, I got off on it. I had never come so hard. I hope he knows that I’m not going to say anything and that he comes back to visit me again. Even if it is to kidnap and take me away from here. This life is boring. I’ve always fantasized about wanting more. And I think the masked man can give it to me.
“It’s one thirty,” Jayce announces to the room, getting my attention.
Closing the diary, I stand and walk over to the door, turning her light off. Then I sit down in the seat in the far corner and wait.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
SIN
IT’S TWO O’CLOCK on the dot when I hear the front doors open and close. The house is so quiet the sound echoes. There was a reason we had to cut our playtime short at theFreak Show. While in my parents’ kitchen, she had been texting David this morning about coming over tonight. Over my dead body will I allow this dipshit to continue to touch what’s mine. I’ve had my suspicions but wasn’t sure until I saw the pictures that Lincoln gave me. Then to see her tied up in his basement the other night? I couldn’t do anything about it then without giving myself away. I don’t want her knowing it was my cock she came all over.
I sit silently still as I count each step of his boots on the stairs. He pushes her door open with a creak and enters. He doesn’t turn on the light. Instead, he walks over to her bed and chooses the lamp. I smile to myself.
“My girl is already ready for me,” he muses, looking over her exposed body. Her chest rising and falling with each breath she inhales through her nose. She hasn’t moved an inch since I brought her home thirty minutes ago. “Oh, I like these.” He reaches out and runs his knuckles over her pierced nipple, and I fist my hands, rage crawling up my spine like a fire engulfs a wall. Reaching up, he grips the back of his shirt and lifts it over his head.
I stand. “She’s no longer for you.”
He spins around, hands up, and gasps. “Easton?” he breathes my first name. I’ve always gone by Sin because it fits my personality. Only my parents call me by my first name. “What the fuck are you doing here?” His brown eyes widen.
“I’m here for her,” I inform him.
He frowns, turning back to Elli. Then looks at me once again. “I don’t understand.”
I step into him. “You are to stay the fuck away from her,” I warn, causing his eyes to narrow.
“I will not…”
“Tomorrow morning, you will drop her from your class.” This son of a bitch sits at his desk while she stands in front of his class reading off her deepest, darkest desires, and then he fucks her in secret. He uses his students, exploits them. Elli isn’t the only student he’s been fucking, and the Lords have found out.
When she was distracted reading over her text messages this morning, I had Jayce get into her backpack on the island and pull out her notebook for class. Everyone knows what goes on inside Mr. Hamilton’s classes, but Barrington University allows it. Like the Lords, it has its own rules.